four and a half

Sea of... Carpet?

2008-02-12T11:15:00.000+07:00

To save this blog from oblivion I suppose I should post my recent writings.
I think from now on my blogs will be 'imported.'

An exaggeration (but they're always more fun to write anyway):

There was certainly something about that room that tingled the senses. It mocked the atmosphere of a former grandiose that was humbled. As a classroom it did well to intimidate its occupants. Futuristic windows and sleek furnishings created a very collegiate air. The spaced out tables formed an archipelago of islands set against the dark blue background of the carpet. The inhabitants had unconsciously grouped themselves within each tiny landmass in accordance to their academic capabilities. To think of the irony, it would have been very cruel if that had been the distribution in the wild. But then again, book smarts does not always equal street smarts.

To some that atmosphere was home. Perhaps in a prelude to Ivy League acceptances and midnight discussions about Chaucer, that bunch had embraced the academic gold mine it claimed to be. For sure, their hearts did not quicken at the possibility of failure for it did not, nor would it ever, happen to them. In zen-nature speak, they had become one with their surroundings.

The place no doubt suited the rigors of the reputable class but the extent of the weight of the course was gracefully executed by the one in command. The 'captain' established ambitious parameters for every pupil that has ever walked into her class and in doing so rolled the burdens and pressures of being a student into a neatly stacked inverted pyramid on your head. 'Potential' became the word to fear. Expectations grew to great heights. To balance that pyramid throughout the whole period would be impressive; the load only gets wider and heavier with time.

It was always tricky to discern exactly what was expected of you there. At times, you are confident you can read the signs and avoid Madame Le Guillotine but that confidence is usually always quickly deflated. It was for me, anyway.

If it was anything with the brighter stars and 'natural-born' leaders it was their pragmatism, which I daresay, I admire a great deal. To abandon an recondite state of mind and think within the boundaries of rationality was something to revel in. And though scorned by 'true idealists,' you can not deny the successes which were borne from living in that theory. It certainly did not hurt their cause.

Sometimes I wonder if everything said within the confinement of the course really is to be believed. The captain has to be optimistic to keep the crew on board with the mission and avoid any mutinies, naturally, but to a point she must be ruthlessly brutal with her honesty. Surely, she does not truly believe we all have the capabilities of 'making it'... whatever that means.

To those of us on this side of the line, our existence becomes precarious. Our dreams are so wildly creative and optimistic they border on absurdity. We undermine the nature of our errors secretly to ourselves after thoroughly berating them with our peers. Disappointment becomes a fairly useful word to describe our mental state at any point on our emotional range. Any return of assignments becomes a weekly ritual of dread and panic. The nonchalant attitude must be at the surface at all times, but inside the blood rushes in anticipation for numbers that could ruin the day's outlook and words that will diffuse the ecstasy of a light-hearted, naive hope welling up inside you. After more than enough in failures, decampment is still not permitted. So the bitterness is swallowed and the cycle of hopefulness and despair begins once more.

To what extent can this demanding world be tolerated inside an abstract mind? To what point can it be said that the reason for failure is only within the faults and weaknesses of those pursuing this path? If one person is able, does it really mean all others have no excuse? As one who is not particularly susecptible to any 'encouragement' and will not be moved by any pushes except those that are derived internally, I must say that the world is always at blame (thus the reason I am even writing this, true?)

If nothing else, I am kept sane by the anticipation for that sudden burst of freedom; the exodus from such a repressive and stifling environment.

The bright, blue skies of the real world beckon for an abandonment of structure and rational thought, but for the moment my only adventures lie within the imaginary ocean of navy blue carpet.

Blog Postings [Phoebe's]

2007-12-11T22:10:00.000+07:00

Blog postings up to December 10, 2007.

[8/30] Love Learning, Despise School
[9/6] 'Jersey Boys' Response
[9/10] Attention All Languid Scholars
[9/22] Assessment of Art
[9/29] Why I Do It
[10/4] Stream of Consciousness (Blurbs)
[10/27] Alone
[11/3] In the Life of...
[11/14] Dear Mother
[12/4] Looking In

2 new ones:
[12/10] Off-Color Obsession
[12/11] No, Thank You: An Intro

No, Thank You: An Intro

2007-12-10T12:41:00.000+07:00

I have never attended a private school before this and I've always had quite negative inclinations towards them, their students, and their administrations. By the time I was in 4th grade many of my friends had begun to transfer into private schools, mostly to all-girls/boys schools (those few that I knew that attended Catholic schools had moved at around 2nd or 3rd grade). Nothing would change in terms of our usual gatherings and outings but naturally we said our goodbyes. We feared for the worst: that they would become one of them.

It's not that we were unreasonably poor - I'm sure most of us in our group had parents that could afford to send their kids to private schools - certainly though, our parents had very different views on education. The wealth of some of my friends was also not so easily distinguished. It was hidden not among luxurious and excessive displays of material possessions such as jewelry as much as it was shown in their houses. They weren't big mansions but they were historical landmarks. Virginia as a whole often fails to attract many tourists because of its lack of "exciting" attractions. What we have are centuries of American history perserved within our seemingly dark and distant forests. We're over our heads in history that I sometimes think people have already forgotten about us ("Oh, well, at least we know that we won't ever get attacked by terrorists!" from a friend).

Nonetheless, I didn't think much of those "private school girls." In terms of education and intelligence they certainly did not amount to much. They were shallow and had such a negative assertiveness to their whole persona. They had so much confidence in everything that came out of their mouths regardless of what nonsense they spewed out. They lived lavishly in hopes that the spotlight would forever be on them. Unfortunately, a lot of my friends became these girls. My relationships with them grew to be quite interesting. I had my closer friends with whom I would mock and make fun of the prissies but I was not at all mean to them. Whenever we got together it just seemed like a big joke. Naturally, I did not think as highly of them. They had too many secrets around them, it was the grandest scale of hypocricies.

People here are often quite surprised to know that I had gone to a public school in the states. My middle school especially was predominantly African-American. Sure, there was trouble but in many ways I think my head was straighter there than it is here. I guess you can say I have yet to master the art of juggling my deceptions.

Sometimes I wonder who's pitying who...

Off-color Obsession

2007-12-10T12:19:00.000+07:00

I remember around the time I was in 7th grade I developed an obsession with suicide. Death, in general, had intrigued me but I had stumbled upon a few fictional novels surrounding the issue of teenage suicide and it drew me in. I was not at all suicidal or even depressed, in fact, at that time, I was pretty content with my life and who I was - something I was not accustomed to up to this point. There was something obscure and alluring about the very thought. Some melancholy beauty that seemed majestic yet terrifying at the same time. It scared me, but I just couldn't take myself out of the darkness. Much like Annie John actually, with her slight obsession with death.

I did my own research of course, and read real stories about teen suicide. It amazed me how altogether complex these adolescent minds must be! (Or maybe by choosing 'the easy way out' their minds became blurred to form one continuous strand that was not at all complicated). People called it cowardice that these victims would take their own life - a decision not meant for imperfect, unenlightened, human minds - but surely you must have some ounce of courage within you to dare stop the wheels of your existence.

I couldn't understand the depths to which they felt their loss, their grief. Was it truly possible for one to be so overcome with worthlessness and sorrow that they would even consider to end it by simply disappearing? 'How stupid,' I thought. I mean, the least you could do was runaway first. Do something extravagant before you kill yourself. You were going to die anyway.

The following year, I was in 8th grade and word got around about a suicide that happened at a middle school outside of the city. Apparently, it had been one of my close friend's acquaintances. I would expect this shook some of us quite a bit. Suicides weren't uncommon, but I would expect that Richmond doesn't have a high suicide rate. Most troubled teens move on to the Carolinas and proceed to commit more moral self-destruction there before they would even consider physical harm to themselves. I did not watch the special on the local news about the event, but from my friends, I had gathered that she killed herself because of a bad breakup with a boyfriend and her subsequent 'D' on a test shortly following. I pitied her so much. 'What a lost soul.' Imagine killing yourself over a test grade.

Now, that I am reminded of it again, I am reconsidering my stance on her death. Sure, there are the really idiotic ones who commit suicide for attention, but I don't find it impossible that things as small as a break-up and a fail could push someone over the edge. If you have multitudes of pressure mounting on you, a little blow could soon be destructive and cause a mental implosion. I can certainly relate to that. To have something so overbearing always on your shoulder. There are no time-outs. There seems to be no escape because what you thought was your asylum has disappeared, and in its place is now another monster. Saying it aloud - what she must have been feeling - would only degrade its importance. How could you express something like that in something as concrete and restricting as words?

The news of that girl swept over us like another breeze. After the day it came up on the news, no one else mentioned the story; none of us had really cared in the first place. Besides, there were sniper alerts and school shootings taking place closer to home. At the same time I, too, had realized that my obsession was slowly fading. I was not completely free of it, but I just no longer had the time to sit around and mull around in my thoughts.

It no longer haunts me - the idea of suicide, I mean. It's tragic, but I'm not afraid of it like I was back in middle school. Not that I'm any closer to understanding how they could possibly bring themselves to it, but I must admit I stand aghast at my own discoveries thus far. The thing is though, I understand clearer now what it must be like for them. Whereas, I had been from the outside trying to look into a hazy window, I am now standing on the inside realizing that it had been a one-way mirror all along.

Blog...

2007-12-09T21:35:00.000+07:00

I reallyyy have no clue what to write right now. It is Sunday night and there is one week left of school so I am not really in the school mode. I am just ready to sleep in and take it easy for 3 weeks. WOOHOO! My grandparents are coming on Tuesday and so I am really excited! I just need to get through this last week!! Usually the last week before break is fun... and maybe the last few days will be but i know for sure that these first few days SUCK! Tomorrow I have my IOP to do and lets just say I am super nervous for it!!! Plus I have this weird bahasa homework due tomorrow and I am not even sure what I am supposed to do for it. Then on Tuesday i have a stupid math test plus I think i have my first volley ball game of the season... which I am not looking super forward to because I am not that good at volley ball. I think one of the main reasons that I don't improve that much in volley ball is because i can't understand what she is saying. She speaks in Indonesian the whole time and i catch just a few words that she says. These are the times that I wish I lived back in America! Haha. Friday night was the deeper concert, and it was actually really fun. The band is really good. The only weird thing was that everyone jumped. Haha I don't know why but when it is christian songs I don't feel like jumping as much as usual. I think my favorite part was when there was the candle lighting and stuff. It was really relaxing and christmas-y.. haha. Today was Zowie's birthday party. It was fun! We went to the Mariot for lunch and has some amazing food! Then we waved and hitted on random guys on the toll road... that was probably the best part! Especially when we tried to through our number at some guy... bwahahaha! Then we went and played pool at Piza. All in all it was a fun day. Boy I really dont want to go back to school tomorrow!! I just have to keep the word HOLIDAY running through my head and I think I will be ok. Well it is kinda late..actually its not but I am tired. Sorry this is a really random post!! My brain couldn't think of anything to write... I think IB has turned it into mush. GUH.
~Hana

CHRISTMAS! CHRISTMAS! CHRISTMAS! -Laura

2007-12-08T15:20:00.001+07:00

christmas is definitly my favourite holiday of the year. i loooooooooove it. i dont know what it is about it that makes me so festive every year, but nevertheless, i do become surprisingly festive. i find it really sad to see people not excited during the christmas season. christmas is always so pretty and exciting i dont know how its possible not to be excited. maybe the fact that i dont have to go to school for three weeks and ill be receiving presents is a big factor as to why i get so excited about this holiday. i guess the only thing i dont like about christmas is having to figure out what presents to buy my family. what if they dont like what i get them? what if someone else gets them the same thing? its just so irritating having to think about all that. i wish i could just read people's minds and buy them what they really want so they wont have to pretend to like the presents i get them if they find it to be average.

do you guys know the song Santa Baby by Eartha Kitt? ive never been so in love with a christmas song until my dad played it on his strereo the other night. yes i know that this is a relatively old song, but its not my fault that i havent heard of it before =). the song's so cute and funny and unique, i never get bored listening to it. i usually dont put the lyrics of songs in my blogs but this song needs to be put in my blog. its too good. (i wont put the whole song down; just little parts of it.)

Santa Baby -Eartha Kitt
Santa baby, slip a sable under the tree, For me.
been an awful good girl,
Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight.

Think of all the fun I've missed,
Think of all the fellas that I haven't kissed,
Next year I could be just as good,
If you'll check off my Christmas list,

Santa cutie, and fill my stocking with a duplex, And checks.
Sign your 'X' on the line,
Santa cutie, and hurry down the chimney tonight.

Come and trim my Christmas tree,
With some decorations bought at Tiffany's,
I really do believe in you,
Let's see if you believe in me,

Santa baby, forgot to mention one little thing, A ring.
I don't mean on the phone,
Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight,
Hurry down the chimney tonight,
Hurry, tonight.

ISNT IT CUTE?!?!?! i highly recommend anyone who hasnt heard of this song to downlowad it right away. i know it may seem a little weird in the beginning since its not very often we hear someone sing about santa that way, but after a while, it really starts to get to you. its addicting and im a MAJOR addict.
------------------------------------------------------------------
here are some christmas jokes:

How come you never hear anything about the 10th reindeer "Olive" ?
Olive ?
Yeah, you know, "Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names"
HAHA!

What did Adam say on the day before Christmas ?
It's Christmas, Eve !
HAHA!

What do elves learn in school?
The ELF-abet
HAHA!

Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?
You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.
HAHA!

(the funnier jokes were kind of off color so i decided it wasnt a good idea to share them) :)

well, i hope all you guys have a lovely christmas and a happy new year. may your parents/siblings/boyfriend(s)/friends give u what you acutally want

GROWING UP

2007-12-08T12:32:00.000+07:00

BUTTERFLY KISSES
BY~ BOB CARLISLE

There's two things I know for sure.
She was sent here from heaven,
And she's daddy's little girl.
As I drop to my knees by her bed at night,
she talks to Jesus, and I close my eyes.
And I thank God for all of the joy in my life, But most of all, for...

Butterfly kisses after bedtime prayer.
Stickin' little white flowers all up in her hair.
"Walk beside the pony daddy, it's my first ride."
"I know the cake looks funny daddy, but I sure tried."
Oh, with all that I've done wrong,
I must have done something right
To deserve a hug every morning,
And butterfly kisses at night.

Sweet Sixten today,
She's looking like her momma
a little more everyday.
One part women, the other part girl.
To perfume and makeup,
from ribbons and curls.
Trying her wings out in a great big world. But I remember...

Butterfly kisses after bedtime prayer.
Stickin' little white flowers all up in her hair.
"You know how much I love you daddy,
But if you dont mind,
I'm only going to kiss you on
the cheek this time."
With all that I've done wrong,
I must have done have something right.
To deserve her love every morning,
And butterfly kisses at night.

All the precious time
Like the wind, the years go by
Precious butterfly
Spread you wings and fly

She'll change her name today.
She'll make a promise,
and I'll give her away.
Standing in the bride room
just staring at her,
she asked me what I'm thinking,
and I said "I'm not sure,
I just feel like I'm losing my baby girl."
Then she leaned over...and gave me...

Butterfly kisses, with her momma there
Sticking little white flowers all up in her hair
"Walk me down the aisle daddy, it's just about time"
"Does my wedding gown look pretty daddy?" "Daddy don't cry"
With all that I've done wrong, I must have done something right
To deserve her love every morning,
And butterfly kisses
I couldn't ask God for more, man, this is what love is
I know I gotta let her go, but I'll always remember
Every hug in the morning, and butterfly kisses..

THIS SONG STARTED PLAYING ON MY IPOD AS I WAS WORKING OUT THIS MORNING. I HADN'T LISTENED TO IT FOR QUITE SOME TIME AND IT MADE ME STOP AND THINK A LITTLE. ALL OF A SUDDEN IT FEELS LIKE MY LIFE IS GOING SO FAST THAT I CAN'T CATCH UP WITH IT. EVERY TIME I TURN AROUND I HAVE A WHOLE DIFFERENT SET OF EMOTIONS FLOODING THROUGH ME. ONE MINUTE I FEEL HAPPY AND EXCITED ABOUT LIFE, AND THE NEXT MINUTE I JUST WANT TO STAY IN BED AND NEVER SEE ANYONE EVER AGAIN. I REALIZE THAT IT IS THE AGE THAT IM AT AND I HAVE TONS OF "CHANGES" HAPPENING IN ME RIGHT NOW OR AT LEAST THAT IS WHAT MY MOM KEEPS TRYING TO TELL ME. I KNOW THAT THOSE THINGS ARE ALL TRUE BUT THIS SONG BRINGS ME BACK TO WHEN I WAS YOUNGER. LIFE WAS SO SIMPLE AND FUN. YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO WORRIE ABOUT GRADES OR GUYS OR EATING HEALTHY OR ANYTHING. I MISS THE DAYS WHEN LIFE WAS CARE FREE. WHEN NO ONE CARED ABOUT ANYTHING BUT WHAT RECESS GAME TO PLAY NEXT. RIGHT NOW ITS LIKE MY BRAIN IS ON OVER DRIVE AND MY EMOTIONS ARE ON THOSE SPINNING STRAWBERRY RIDES AT CARNIVALS. AND THEN SINCE THE SPINNING OVER DRIVE IS TAKING PLACE MY BODY CAN'T KEEP UP AND EVENTUALLY I JUST FALL INTO A HEAP. EVERYTHING SEEMS SO UNCERTAIN AND UNSTABLE RIGHT NOW. LIKE ANY SECOND EVERYTHING COULD BE FLIPPED... AND IM NOT SURE IT THE FLIP SIDE WOULD BE BETTER OR WORSE TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH, BECAUSE IM NOT SURE IF WHERE I AM AT IS GOOD OR BAD. GEEZE, I THINK OF THIS SONG AND IT TALKES ABOUT A DAD LOVING HIS DAUGHTER AND HOW SHE GROWS UP. AND I CAN'T HELP BUT THINK "I DON'T WANNA GROW UP!" HAHAHA BECOMING OLDER USED TO SOUND FUN AND EXCITING TO ME, BUT NOW I JUST FEEL LIKE IM IN A WHIRL WIND AND IM NOT READY TO BE ON MY OWN OR COMPLETELY GROWN UP. THE THING IS THOUGH, THAT WETHER I, READY OR NOT ITS STILL GOING TO HAPPEN... AND ITS GOING TO HAPPEN SOONER RATHER THEN LATER.

WE WILL ALL MAKE IT ONE WAY OR ANOTHER!

~Hana

confusion...

2007-12-07T23:26:00.000+07:00

SOMETIMES I WISH THAT WE JUST DIDNT FEEL AT ALL...
...SOMETIMES YOUR HEART CAN BE WRONG...
...I DONT UNDERSTAND OUR HEART AT ALL...
...PEOPLE SAY TO FOLLOW YOUR HEART...
...BUT WHAT IF YOUR HEART IS WRONG...
...WHY DO WE SOMETIMES FEEL SOMETHING THATS NOT MEANT TO BE...
...AND HOW DO WE TELL OUR HEART FROM OUR HEAD...
...SOMETIMES WE GET HAPPY OR EXCITED BECAUSE OF WHAT WE THINK OUR HEART IS SAYING...
...MAYBE WE GET ANXIOUS OR DREAM TOO SOON...
...THEN QUICKLY WE REALIZE THAT IT COULD NEVER BE...
...AND OUR HEART HURTS...AGAIN...
...IT SEEMS LIKE IT NEVER STOPS...
...THE GLANCES...
...THE SMILES...
...THE BUTTERFLIES...
...THE MOMENTS...
...THAT QUICKLY FADE TO NOTHINGNESS...
...THAT SEEM TO BE ALL MISUNDERSTOOD...
...THEN OUR HEAD TELLS US THAT WE ARENT GOOD ENOUGH, PRETTY ENOUGH, SMART ENOUGH...
...AND THAT SEEMS TO BE THE ONLY THING THAT ENDS UP RIGHT...

~Hana

public speaking. -Laura

2007-12-07T17:52:00.000+07:00

i hate public speaking. i don't know what it is about me but i just cant seem to gather up the courage to have the ability to sound remotely intelligent when i have to stand up in front of a group of people and present something. its really annoying. i suppose what really gets my nerves going is the thought of getting up there and having my voice shake when I'm in the middle of talking. do you know how embarrassing it is to have everyone know how nervous you are when you're in the middle of presenting? you just feel like digging yourself a hole in the ground and hiding in it. i tried everything to get rid of this fear of public speaking, including trying to imagine everyone naked. it doesn't work. the one and only time i tried this method was during my 7th grade BI presentation. all it did for me was make myself appear even stupider. the thought of everyone naked did indeed make me laugh, but it wasn't the kind that took away the anxiousness, but the kind that added to it. i don't know how, but it still managed to make me feel horrible. this fear started off as something little that i thought would eventually go away, but instead it had this snowball effect on me. the more presentations i had to do, the more nervouse i'd get. it came to the point where even i thought it was ridiculous how nervous i became. it was just a presentation! then, i finally figured it out the secret.

its amazing how much your mind is in control of your emotions. i figured out that all i had to do was make myself beleive that the presentation wasnt a big deal and POOF i wasnt nervous anymore =D amazing. sadly i get easily influenced by the emotions of other people so if i see another classmate of mine spazing out about their presentation, ill freak out too. in short, i am still afraid of public speaking but as long as i keep myself calm, ill be able to prevent myself from looking dumb in front of the class and ill be alright. so if anyone out there has the same problem i do, take my advice and just try to convince yourself that giving a presentation is nothing. good luck!

Time for Christmas.. *byzoe.

2007-12-06T07:48:00.000+07:00

December is the Christmas Season, but it's also the month in which my birthday takes place. In a way, i guess it's a good thing because there are a lot of people in the Christmas mood.. meaning they're in a giving mood :P but then again, it can also be a really bad thing. Sometimes people get so caught up in the Christmas season that they forget everything else that's going on. I'm not saying that my birthday is a big deal, it's nowhere near as important as Christmas, but yeah.. i don't know. Anyway, aside from my birthday falling in the same month as Christmas, I actually really enjoy the Christmas season! Everyone is in a good mood, everyone is in a giving mood, it brings families and friends together, the weather is usually good (in Aus), and school tends to be a little more laid back - meaning there are more fun activities that we all are able to enjoy.
This Christmas will be the first Christmas I've had without my grandfather. Every year for pretty much my whole life, my dads side of the family would meet at my grandfathers house and we'd all enjoy an awesome lunch along with some old family stories. Maybe it doesn't seem like fun but actually, it was because this was one of the only times i got to see my grandfather - unless we were visiting him in hospital - because he lived so far away from us. Also, being in Indonesia for the past 2 and a half years doesn't help either, because for the last 2 years of his life we barely saw him, and we couldn't really speak to him on the phone because about 4 years ago he had cancer on his voice box, meaning it had to be removed; making it kind of hard to understand him. This year, I'll be spending Christmas with my Aunty and her family. I'm not saying that's a bad thing, because it's not! I'll get to spend time with my cousins, we can go in the swimming pool, hang out, go to the beach, or just sit in the lounge room and watch movies. I'm just saying that it would be nice if my grandfather could join us again, just like he did last Christmas.

Enchanted.. <3 *byzoe

2007-12-05T18:02:00.000+07:00

Linking to my last post, following my last exam I went to the movies with YouJin to watch Enchanted. I wasn't sure what to expect, because i hadn't seen the previews or heard much about it aside from what some people in school had said about it. The movie started at 9:10pm, we were a little late, but we still got to watch majority of it. In the beginning it seemed kind of cheezy, but then as the movie progresses you kind of start to get into it. McDreamy (Patrick Dempsey) is so adorable. I know he's kind of old and all, but his eyes *sigh*, they aren't far from perfect, not far at all! While watching this movie you begin to get into the mindset that fairytales do come true; well, i did anyway. You just can't help yourself. Fairytales are made up stories of happily ever afters that are never actually seen in real life, but only in storybooks. Still, everyone - at least once in a lifetime - wishes for a fairytale, but then finds themselves disappointed because what they once thought so real, turns out to be the total opposite: a complete lie. But then again, peoples perceptions of fairytales could vary, right? And therefore, maybe some peoples fairytales do come true, and they do end up getting their 'happily ever after' after all.
Not only does the storyline, and that fine slither of hope really get to you when you watch this movie, but it's also the music that helps to have a greater impact on the audience. I actually watched Enchanted again the on the Saturday following the Wednesday of exams. I still remember the way that Hannah, Kendal and I sat in awe when McDreamy was dancing with Giselle at the ball. It wasn't necessarily the way that they danced, or even the way McDreamy looked at her (although it was pretty sweet), it was more the music that played while they danced, and the meaning of the lyrics that made the setting that-much-more perfect!

The song is called:

'So Close' by Jon McLauglin.

You’re in my arms
And all the world is calm
The music playing on for only two
So close together
And when I’m with you
So close to feeling alive

A life goes by
Romantic dreams will stop
So I bid mine goodbye and never knew
So close was waiting, waiting here with you
And now forever I know
All that I wanted to hold you
So close

So close to reaching that famous happy end
Almost believing this was not pretend
And now you’re beside me and look how far we’ve come
So far we are so close

How could I face the faceless days
If I should lose you now?
We’re so close
To reaching that famous happy end
And almost believing this was not pretend
Let’s go on dreaming for we know we are
So close
So close
And still so far

I've been addicted to this song ever since I heard it, I downloaded it, and I play it on repeat. I love it! Im not sure about the guys (because im not a guy) but being a girl, hearing that song, at that particular moment, makes it stand out so much more. It makes you listen to the lyrics and take in every last word of what he says, because it is those words that makes the moment oh-so-perfect, and absolutely priceless!

Freedom? I wish.. *byzoe.

2007-12-05T17:43:00.000+07:00

It's exactly one week after exams. I was so happy, so full of life, so 'free'. Little did I know the weeks that would follow would be so miserable. Straight after I got out of that final exam on Wednesday the 28th of November, I felt a sudden rush, I felt as if I could do anything I wanted to and nobody would tell me to stop.. and to my surprise, I was right! That whole afternoon I was out and about, eating lunch with friends, just chilling out, and then watching late night movies. It was great, absolutely priceless, I couldn't have wished for it any other way. Usually my parents would let me go out after school but i had curfews and certain things i had to do before-hand. But on that particular night, the amount of freedom I was granted was absolutely unbelievable! Thursday and Friday werent so bad either, we didnt have much homework, received some of our results - which of course lead to various emotions, ranging from ecstatic to pretty far down in the dumps - and our classes were a little more laid back. Excitement was seen in the hallways through the bounce that the students had in their steps - school was finally starting to seem okay! Then came Monday...

Unfortunately, things went back to normal. The overflow of homework came pouring in, the bounce in the students steps slowly stopped and the freedom that was experienced over those few days following exams, was no longer seen. I, personally, didnt expect to get an overflow of homework right after exams, but then i realized: This is IB! It wasnt necessarily just the homework, but it was also the fact that our CAS was due, along with certain parts of our extended essays that we havent even thought about due to our stressing over exams and other assesments such as tests, presentations and IOP's. I guess it's not that these things are all extremely difficult, I think it's just that I got so used to that idea of freedom (even though it was only for a few days) that i didnt prepare myself for what was still to come. Yes, in the back of my mind I knew that these things were coming, but i didnt want to believe it, so I could make the most of my 'freedom'. Urgh, big mistake!

RANDOM FACTS

2007-12-05T14:00:00.000+07:00

Alrighty...well i just cant think of a topic today but i did find some very interesting facts that i thought i would share with you!...
1. IT IS ILLEGAL TO SLURP SOUP IN JEW JERSEY. ... what the? my dad would never last!
2. WOMEN BLINK NEARLY TWICE AS MUCH AS MEN. ...i wonder why...
3. IT IS A CRIMINAL OFENCE TO DRIVE AROUND IN A DIRTY CAR IN RUSSIA. ... strange...
4. AVERAGE PERSON LOSES TWO BALL POINT PENS A WEEK. ... im average!
5. IT IS AGAINST THE LAW IN CHICAGO TO EAT AT A PLACE WHILE IT IS ON FIRE. ... o good, i was gonna try that...
6. IT IS AGAINST THE LAW TO PAWN OFF YOUR DENTURES IS LAS VEGAS. ... ill keep that in mind...
7. A HOUSE FLYS BUZ IS IN THE MIDDLE OCTAVE, KEY OF F. ... so musical!
8. THE WORD GYMNASIUM COMES FROM THE GREEK WORD GYMNAZEIN WHICH MEANS "TO EXERCISE NAKED". ...bwahahaha!
9. LOS ANGELES'S FULL NAME IS "EL PUEBLO DE NUESTRA SENORA LA REINA DE LOS ANGELES DE PORCIUNCULA. ...whoa!
10. A PREGNANT GOLD FISH IS CALLED A TWIT. ... who thought of that?!?
11. IN ENGLAND THE "SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE" IS NOT ALLOWED TO SPEAK. ..right, cause that makes perfect sense...
12. EVERY TIME YOU LICK A STAMP YOU ARE CONSUMING 1/10 OF A CALORIE. ...yikes!
13. LEFT HANDED PEOPLE LIVE SLIGHTLY SHORTER LIVES THAN RIGHT HANDED PEOPLE. ...good thing im a righty!
14. WHEN INTOXICATED, AND ANT WILL ALWAYS FALL TO ITS RIGHT SIDE. ...who would try that?
15. WHEN SWANS STICK THEIR HEADS TOGETHER IT MEANS THEY WILL BE TOGETHER FOR LIFE. ...awwww
16. TOPLESS SALES WOMEN ARE LEGAL IN LIVERPOOL, ENGLAND, BUT ONLY IN TROPICAL FISH STORES. ... yea..well duhh
17. IN FLORIDA IF YOUR SINGLE, DIVORCED OR A WIDOWED WOMAN YOU CANT PARACHUTE ON A SUNDAY AFTERNOON. ..what
18. IN CARMEL NEW YORK IT IS ILLEGAL FOR A MANS JACKET AND PANTS NOT TO MATCH. ...haha i love this law!
19. YOU ARE MORE LIKELY TO GET ATTACKED BY A COW THAN A SHARK. ...thats sad...
20. THE ONLY FOOD THAT COCKROACHES WONT EAT ARE CUCUMBERS. ...good to know

haha wow some of those things were actually cool!...and some..well... :p

~Hana

Looking In

2007-12-04T20:29:00.000+07:00

No matter how hard I try I know that I'll always be looking in from the outside. No matter how nice they try to be, the wall is too tall, too thick for penetration.

For a part of my life I truly believed I was one of the naturally smart ones. That time being the time I moved to Richmond after being in a national Indo pre-school class doing page long math addition problems every night. And then came years of cruising through projects, essays, and tests. Eventually though, learning became something I wasn't forced to do. University life with its worldly professors, cramped dorms, late nights, and intellectual discussions had attracted my efforts. That was what I made university life to be in my mind then. And for that I actually tried spending hours stuffing my head with random facts to appear to look smart when I would dish out useless information to my friends about dead guys in history. I knew I wasn't naturally gifted but I'd like to think I fooled a lot of people. Here and now I know where I stand in school's social-academic ladder. But that lure of university facade is calling me back and has actually led me to think I can achieve that level of scholarly stupor. Something that seems to be seeping out of that particular group.

Ironically, I'm not sure they realize how exclusive they actually are. They try to be quite inclusive actually, warming up to strangers and sharing polite smiles to those of different social cliques. No matter how friendly and just darn nice they are though, it won't take away from the fact that anyone who dares venture into their realm will undoubtedly feel more excluded then they were before. They exude an air of confidence and intelligence that equally amazes and intimidates. They are the humanitarians, the debaters, the politicians, the orators, the leaders. They are the ones talking Nietzsche and foreign affairs in a Starbucks Saturday afternoons and the ones staying up on school nights to watch 'feed-me' TV only to analyze it and come back the next day ranting about how the last episode was so the Edgar Allen Poe horror.

Each individual of that group adds something dynamic to the table. Some are really school smart and it shows. The others are perpetual idea machines. Some are drama queens, while some could probably be identified as professional cynics if there ever was such a thing. Their tastes in music, movies, clothes go from one end of the spectrum to the other but it's their thirst, their hunger that unites them.

Not to say also that I'm not one any of those things or I couldn't do any of those, but they certainly have a certain spark that most people seem to lack.

On the surface they're just another clique in this high school circus. If you look deeper - really get to know who they are and why they're here - it becomes obvious that when you sit down to have a real conversation with them the enigma sitting in front of you will begin to unravel its many layers.

If nothing else deserves one's envy in this school, they certainly would be the closest.

LIFE

2007-12-04T18:52:00.000+07:00

Ok so my cousin just had a baby boy. It was a month in a half early and had the cord wrapped around its neck...how sad! Plus this poor guy doesn't even have a name yet because he came so early haha. But that is not the reason why i am writing this blog. You see my cousin was always the type that NEVER wanted to get married..let alone have children. Her dream was to be a brain surgeon and adopt 2 little African girls. HAHAHA...that dream obviously never happened. So when she got engaged at the end of high school we were shocked! And when she got pregnant a year later, we were seriously floored! But i am really happy for her. She has a wonderful husband and now a new baby christmas present! But all of this stuff just got me thinking... what we picture our selves doing in 5 or 10 years, or what we want for ourselves in the future is definetly not always what is going to happen. Most of the time God has much bigger and better things ahead. That helps me because sometimes i get hung up on how to get that certain guys attention, or how i am going to break the news to my parents that i failed yet another bio test. But i have started to realize that no matter what we think or do Gods will, will always happen. I mean im not saying to fail every test and turn into a hag because nothing matters anymore. Im just saying that it helps and can be a comfort, especially when we are all trying to figure our who and what we want to be, or what college we want to go to, or any of that. It is so easy to get wrapped up in what we want and the way we want our life to go..but if my cousin had applied for medical school instead of getting married she would not be where she is today. That doesn't mean not to follow your dreams though. i guess i just realized that dreams can change...actually they usually do.
~Hana

Love Languages

2007-12-03T19:08:00.000+07:00

In TOK class we have been learning about languages and how they are so closely connected to knowlege, in fact, without some way to communicate, knowledge would be quite unuseable. Similarily, love languages bring people together in a way that would be impossible without them. The five main love languages are:

Touch ~ a hug, holding hands, or even a simple squeeze on the shoulder
Words ~ saying I love you, thank you or wishing them a great day
Gifts ~ a card, flowers, anything, no occasion needed
Time ~ taking time out of your busy schedule just to spend time with them
Service ~ babysitting the kids, making their favorite meal, doing something to help them out

The range of importance of these depends on each individual so it is important to be observant and figure out which of these is most important to your loved ones. Once you know each other's prime love language, you will be able to love more effectively and deeply!

As for me (hehe), I think my main love languages are touch, time, and words. I guess that would make me a very touchy feely person ya? Hahaha..well, honestly hand hold is one of my favorite acts of affection. I also feel loved when I know someone has put effort into spending time with me, it's called sacrifice. And last but certainly not least, words. It is true that words can either build a man up or tear him down. A simple "I love you" straight from the heart is one of the most beautiful uses of language ever made.

Now it's your turn. Go through the list and decide which love language or languages is the most important to you. Look for those acts of love when you are around your loved ones, you may need to let them know which make you feel loved the most, they may have no idea. Then observe or even ask them which are most important to them and try your best to live up to it. Without a doubt, whether it is one of your family members, spouse, your bestfriend, boyfriend or girlfriend, you will develope a better relationship with them by putting their needs infront of your own and show them the kind of love they yearn for.

written by kendal m.

Kendalism

2007-12-03T18:50:00.000+07:00

This is what I call Kendalism...

If yellow was colorless, fish would drown.
If the wind was stiff, we would fly on the ground.

If feathers melted, grapes would turn to rocks.
If space was pink, our ears would wear socks.

If boys flew elephants, french fries would melt in cracks.
If sunshine was unethical, babies would come on racks.

If jellybeans grew arms, water bottles would eat shoes.
If glass was hairy, our livers would take a snooze.

If plastic covered the earth, fresh milk would be toxic.
If a guitar wet the bed, cotton balls would become exotic.

If sunsets ate garfield, monkeys would eat ice cream out of a boot.
If flies could tell time, telephones would fry fruit.

..yes, random is my fort`e!

Christmas Cheer

2007-12-03T16:27:00.000+07:00

So it is 3 days into December. The stocking are hung the tree is decorated and christmas music is playing throughout the town... but i still can't seem to get into the christmas spirit. There is one thing that is missing from the season this year... snow! Back in the US the coming of the holiday season was marked by cold weather, the downfall of snow and icicles hanging off the trees. Without that i just can't bring myself to believe that christmas is coming. I mean of course i believe it but it just doesn't feel like it to me. I keep blasting "chestnuts roasting on an open fire"... one of my favorite christmas songs... in my room but that doesn't seem to do it. Last night i even turned my AC up on high and put my big comfy sweats on. Then i put my Mariah Carey christmas album on with some hot chocolate and started sewing christmas bags (what?!?!)... and ill admit that for a time it actually did work. That is until i looked out my window to find a big palm tree and remembered that i am in the middle of tropical weather... not Oregon's frigid winters. I don't know why snow is something that means "CHRISTMAS IS COMING" to me but it really does. Usually on christmas we make hot chocolate and cider and bundle up in out cute sweaters and boots and go for a christmas walk. Or we sit by the fire all warm and toasty eating carmel corn and cookies....ahhh the joys of christmas in America. Usually we get in the hot tube and dare each other to roll in the snow and then get back in the water while burning our skin off from the shock of the temperature. Usually we go sledding or have a huge snowball fight. I guess you could have a mango fight or something here but they might hurt a little more.
So this year i think me and my family will start some new traditions. Maybe there is no snow but hey we can still find ways to feel warm and fuzzy inside. After all christmas time is supposed to be a time to gather up all your family and enjoy each others company on the day our savior was born. So rain, shine, snow or... cookie dough?... i will get into the christmas spirit this year!
~Hana

Exaaaams! & the "fear" -Laura

2007-11-23T22:58:00.001+07:00

i dont know how i remembered to write my blog for this week since ive been so busy studying for my exams. i have seriously never spent so much time on studying. i guess the thought of failing these exams has scared me enough to make me put an effort into studying. last year, during the 10th grade exams, i dont think i studied at all - a couple hours maximum, but now being in 11th grade, its different.i have to start worrying about my future and bringing up my GPA to get into a decent college. its really freaking me out.

last summer, my cousin christina who had just graduated from cornell, went on and on about how i really needed to stop fooling around and start focusing on what i needed to do to get into a good college. she said that when she was in 9th grade, she was just like me. rarely did her homework, rarely studied (if she did, she would study a couple hours before the test), barely passed her classes and always played around. like me, everytime she doubted ever slacking off or wondered if she should actually be studying, she would always make up this excuse to make herself believe that playing around was fine. her excuse was: life is short, so you might aswell enjoy it. i mean, it sounds right. why not enjoy life and its benefits while it still lasts? then christina went on to tell me that by 10th grade she felt the "fear". the fear that hits you when u realize that you might not actually go anywhere or be somebody if you dont put your act together. sadly, that "fear" didnt hit me until the beginning of 11th grade.

in 10th grade, my grades were horrible. i had never failed a class in my life until 10th grade where i practically failed all my classes, and to top it all off i did some things (which im not particularly proud of) that put me into such a complicated situation. at that time i was still oblivious to the situation i was in and didnt realize that i was digging myself a really deep hole. it wasnt until some said to me, "you know laura, dont act as if everything's going to work itself out. if you keep acting like this, dont expect to get into college. you have to work your way to get there." now, being in a family that takes education really seriously, that hit me really hard. how embarrassing would it be to be the only person in your family whose it too stupid to get into college? since then i officially had the "fear".

the beginning in 11th grade i knew i had a lot of things to make up for and i tried me best to get my grades up, but over time - like most things do - the fear started to fade. i started not to care anymore. it wasnt until i received my first report card. it was definitly better than any of my 10th grade report cards, but it wasnt good enough to get into a good college and 1st term was supposed to be the easiest.

these exams coming up are scaring me half to death because i need to do well in them but i know that there's a pretty good chance that i wont because these things always happen to me. when i study and study and study, and i feel like i did well on the test, i end up flunking it. i just hope that if i flunk these exams, ill do better on the later ones.

but as my brother likes to say, "dont bother stressing out. if you've studied all that you could and tried your hardest, the best you can do is get a good nights rest and relax. there is no benefit gained from stressing out."

Force. -Laura

2007-11-17T13:32:00.000+07:00

have you ever forced yourself to like somthing you previously felt like barfing on everytime you looked at it? well i have, and it seems so stupid to do so, but i cant help it. i like being in on the fun, and when i see someone enjoying something that i cant, it gets me feeling really irritated. im not talking about forcing myself to like someone i dont. im not talking about forcing myself to join a sport that i hate. im talking about forcing myself to like food that i hated tasting.

i know it might sound weird, but one of the things that i had to force myself to like was the kraft's macaroni and cheese pack thing. there was nothing particularly disgusting about it - i liked the taste of cheese and i liked macaroni - but there was just something about that didn't taste right. maybe it was the mixture of cheese and macaroni that seemed awkward to me. anyway, i just didnt like it. i think my want to like macaroni and cheese started when i saw how much my brothers enjoyed it when they were eating it. i would see them stuff their faces and eat more and more boxes until they were about to pop, but when they had me try it, i couldnt help but feel dissapointed. when i say that i forced myself to like it, i dont mean that consiously said to myself "EAT THE MACARONI AND CHEESE! EAAAT IT!!" but it was more of a subconcious thought saying, "aw cmon, look at your brothers eating it. they make it look so good. you know it tastes good. u just have to believe it tastes good... yeeaaaa its so yummy." and eventually i grew to love it. i would join my brothers in their want to stuff their faces with mac and cheese and i would have such a fun time doing it. i hate to admit it, but i also think that there was another reason i forced myself to like macaroni and cheese. i think it was because i wanted to be apart of my brothers' lives. i mean, i was always the one left out becuase i was so young in their eyes and also because i was a girl. just once, i wanted to be invloved in the fun to. im ashamed to admit it, but its true. =)

there is one other thing i forced myself to like. Durian.
when i was little, my family and i would very frequently drive up to Puncak and stay at my grandparents' villa and everytime we went, we always brought durian. i suppose it was some sort of tradition. anyway, my brothers always went on and on about how yummy durian tasted (i guess by now you can tell how much influence my brothers had on me)and that i should try it. by the way they described the taste of this spikey looking fruit, i imagined it to be the best tasting fruit i have and will have tasted in my whole entire life, so u can imagine my dissapointment when i took the a bite so big that my felt like the sides of my mouth were going to tear, into this so called amazing fruit and discovered that it tasted like poop. i couldnt believe that my brothers thought that this tasted good. ofcourse i didnt want to dissapoint them so i pretended that it tasted OK. the next time i had a taste of the durian fruit, wasnt until 2 years after. what possessed me to try this disgusting fruit was the thought that maybe my taste of things had changed over the last 2 years and i might actually enjoy its taste this time. after all, my brothers are in love with it, so how bad could it be? i quickly remembered why i had stayed away from this fruit for so long. i still tasted like poop. over the years my brothers were insistent on making me try the fuit again and again, and i was insistent on making myself like it. i suppose i grew to like it over time becuase it was given to me to try several times and today im actually happy that i had come to like this fruit because it actually tastes really REALLY good. best fruit in the world.

even though i have made myself like different foods, there are still some out there that ive given up on. i cannot bring myself to like mooncake, even though my whole family loves it, and i cant bring myself to like mushrooms. so you see, it is possible to force yourself to like food if the want for it is great, but there are just some things people cant force themselves to like so dont put pressure on those who dont share the same taste in food as you!

Necrotizing Fasciitis. -Laura

2007-11-16T18:28:00.000+07:00

For B.I class, we were given the task to research about a sickness and present our choice in front of the class using the microsoft power point program on monday. At first i was thinking of doing some boring, old sickness like the cold or the flu, but then i figured that my presentation wouldnt be that interesting if i wasnt interestd in the topic itself, so i asked myself, what is the coolest more nasty disease in the world, and then i remembered the episode on Grey's Anatomy where this woman got the disease called the "flesh eating bacteria" and had to practically cut her leg off to get rid of it. i researched it on the internet to more find out more information about this cool disease and found out that the proper name for the disease was necrotizing fasciitis.

Necrotizing Fasciitis(nekro-tie-zing fah-she-eye-tis)is the most scary disease i have ever seen in my life. it is not a disease that people get often, but it a disease that you would want to avoid at all costs. well, i guess you would want to avoid all diseases at all costs, but this one should be at the top of your list.

people who end up having this disease are healthy prior to the disease. this bacterial infection destroys the skin and the soft tissues beneath it, including fat and the tissue covering the muscles. becuase the skin starts to rot away very quickly, a person with necrotizing fasciitis is sometimes said to be infected with "flesh-eating" bacteria. the only way to get rid of the bacteria, once it has entered the body, cut it out so it is better if the bacterial infection is caught at an early stage, rather than having it spread throughout the whole limb, forcing the person with the infection to cut it off or risk having the infection reach the vital organs which then would ensure the death of the person. most people get this infection just from a small cut they get when in the water. in the Grey's Anatomy episode, the woman who was diagnosed with this disease said that the rash started to appear after she scarped the bottom of her foot on an oyster shell.

im not telling you to rush yourself to the doctor's office everytime you get a small cut, but if you start seeing this red rash spreading VERY rapidly across any part of you body, u better get yourself to the doctor's office as fast as you can to get it checked out becuase you might actually have the "flesh-eating" bacteria.

kinda scary.

heARtS<3

2007-11-15T19:19:00.000+07:00

So i have been thinking about what to blog on here [since i haven't blogged in like 2 months!]. And today i was doodling in econ as always...[sorry mr eric!!] and i started drawing hearts. then as i was looking at my paper i realized that it looked alot like a love note or something with all the hearts i drew on it. and all of a sudden i got to thinking, why is it that a heart it the symbol of love? I mean why not a kidney, or a liver? sure it sounds a little wierd to say "i love you with all my liver!" or "you broke my kidney!" but seriously, why the heart? okok maybe i can see why it is the actual heart...afterall we can all talk about the time our grandma died and we felt the little twinge of pain in our hearts...or the times we see our crush walking down the hallway towards and our heart litterally skips a beat. but why the symbol of the heart...real hearts dont look anything like that. and i can guarantee that if we did draw the exact shape of our own heart on the cute red paper for valentines day..it would not be as romamtic. so i looked it up and here are some peoples take on it: the "heart" shape is the shape of the seed pod called the silphium. i guess that has something to do with love but i still dont get it. the only other thing that i could come up with was that the heart symbol started appearing on stained glass windows of jesus to portray his love for us...interestinggg. but i still dont know where t came from. okok i will make my own guess... i think that in the begining people were really drawing the actual heart in our bodies...but that must have gotten a little complicated and ugly looking. i mean the way our heart looks is nothing that makes me want to be inlove. so over time people just modified it to what it is today. simplicity is the answer! ...actually i still think there is more to it! but i cant seem to find anything..let me know what you think!

Dear Mother

2007-11-14T20:48:00.000+07:00

[Hmm, maybe I shouldn't be contributing and putting up these parent issue blogs at the same time, considering some of them know about these? Oh well...]

I get in a lot of fights with my mom; it's pretty crazy.

For the longest time, I thought my Chinese zodiac was a sheep/ram. My mother was an ox and we would often read at those Chinatown restaurants eating Americanized Chinese food, that the two animals don't get along. Jokes would go around and that became my "justification" as to why my mom and I were the way we were. Later on I discovered - after moving to Indonesia, no less - that I was actually a horse (my birthday's right on the cusp of the Chinese New Year - hey, what did I know about China?)

My mother is the headstrong one in the family. My dad's certainly no wimp in life, but at home he is compelled to follow my mother's orders. I know my parents, especially my mother, care for me like no other but it they certainly don't know how to cultivate a favorable relationship with me.

My dad comes from a family where kids were disciplined by being insulted. My mother claims that she was not one to berate others the way my dad and his family do, but only started to after she married my dad. I believe that claim more than ever now that I'm here and really looking beneath the surface of my [extended] family. When I moved to Richmond all I had were vague memories of unfamiliar faces at Christmas parties or birthdays. As far as I was concerned, I had no other relatives. Looking at them now with the eyes of a less naive, more cynical me, I can see how my parents complete their puzzles.

There was a time when it got to be unbearable almost. My mom and I. W e went from our fight-a-day status to three-fights-a-day. This was during the couple of years before we moved to Indonesia. I guess it was a combination of me entering my "wildest" teenage years and my parents stress over our move but it certainly felt like all she could do was pick a fight with me everyday. She was never truly satisfied with what I had become (something that I held closely with pride), everything I did was wrong (I was expected to fix my own ineptitude when I obviously didn't believe that those were the problems that had to be fixed), and I was forbidden to believe anything contrary to her beliefs (certainly, if she believes a good Christian should be like that, so should I). She actually took up a lot of her threats and I often found myself stranded alone - in more ways than one. I had gotten used to the yelling and screaming every time I had fallen sick or John got into trouble at school, but now added to the list were things out of my control. I was the oldest, therefore I was responsible for everything.

The days grew more drawn-out at home: hazy and weary. I lived my life off of the adrenaline I had forced upon myself. Actually, excluding my home life, those last couple of years had been the best years of my life thus far.

A lot of our fights are actually pretty trivial. They are things my mother feels she has to magnify to the extent that we both get annoyed with each other enough to keep the wheel turning. My mom has a way of making a point without actually having a point to make. I know that she knows she sometimes is wrong, but she would never even consider that she should go back on her word. The more we fought, the more tired I got, the more I rebelled. We were both exhausted from all of the arguments but it pierced us more to let them go. We both arrived in Indonesia with too many scars that would always remain deeply etched into us.

The problem didn't exactly fix itself with the change of environment. The explosions were less frequent but each became more intense than the previous. I've heard that analogy that children are their parents' glass. We start out pure, without any blemishes but over the years we collect dust from the neglect, or scratches from the carelessness. Some of us break into a million pieces and no matter what you do to reverse the fait accompli, the damage is done. I don't know where we'll be in a few years, but I'm determined to preserve what little self-esteem I have left against her repressions.

I'm probably making more of this than what it seems from the outside. I know she cares.

If for nothing else, I want to fix this so I can live knowing that if my mom dies unexpectedly I won't have the panging guilt inside my head of knowing I did nothing to reach out. I guess I'm counting on my moving out to be the catalyst in this process.

Supposedly, distance makes the heart grow fonder...

Things You Need to Know!

2007-11-08T20:38:00.000+07:00

Ok, so have you ever wondered why we have to get those ugly goosepimples (goosebumps)? Today in class I decided it was time to finally find out. (I hate being in the dark about such important things!) So i looked it up on Quiz Cool.com and found the reason why! It said that when we are cold our arrector muscle pulls up the hair, the duct in our sweat glands gets small, and our blood vessels also get smaller. So actually being cold is a very positive situation! Yeah, our skin looks a little peculiar, but being cold makes our arrector muscles work harder than when we are hot and makes us look thinner too! I guess freezing my butt off and getting goosepimples isn't so bad!!

Here's another interesting thing u need to know. Boogers. Yeah, we all hate them, they can be quite disturbing but actually we need them! So I looked it up and found out that mucus (myoo-kuss), the wet stuff in our nose, traps dirt and other floating particles so that we don't breath them into our lungs. That's very important! So when the mucus traps the dirt particles etc. it then dries up and we are left with what we call boogers! So next time you pick your nose, you may want to thank those little boogers for saving your lungs!

I hope you have enjoyed these little tid bits about our bodies! There will be more to come!

Written by Kendal M.

Halloween. -Laura

2007-11-06T16:45:00.000+07:00

I know that by going to a Christian school, not a lot of people will agree with me on this but i dont care. i think that halloween is one of the funnest events of the year. people always say, "what?! if u celebrate halloween, its like your worshiping the devil!! halloween originated from witchcraft and satanic rituals. you shouldn't celebrate it." but i personally think that thats stupid. yes, halloween might have a creepy and an ungodly history, but the reason i celebrate it isnt to worship the devil or anything satanic. i simply find it a fun time to get together with my family to carve pumpkins and argue about whose pumpkin looks the best. i find it fun to get together with my friends to organize a halloween party and to go to that party in a costume that my mom helped make. not everyone who celebrates halloween is evil.

my mom has two preschools in jakarta, and every year she holds halloween parties where the children have the chance to dress up as anything they want to be. for one day, the children get to become their favorite super hero or their all time favorite role model. what other yearly event would they have the chance to do that? halloween is one of those days where the children have the permission to go insane and are able to eat as much candy as they possibly can. its a day to have fun.

one of my best memories of when i was younger was during halloween. have you ever had the chance to go 'trick-or-treat'ing? i went when i was about 7 years old and i remember it to this day. my brothers and i dressed up as ghosts and we went to the pondok indah complex with my mother to join the trick-or-treat event. the most distinct memory i have of that night was the memory of my pumpkin bag filling up with more and more candy as i knocked on more and more doors shouting, "TRICK OR TREAT!!" after my brothers and i had knocked on every door of the complex, we had successfully filled up two whole pumpkin bags each of candy. on the way home, my mom didnt let me eat my sweets, so once i reached my room, i became a mad person, stuffing my face with as many chocolates i could and after a few minutes, i felt like i was going to throw up. i had never felt so sick of chocolate before in my life but i was officially in love with it. Too bad i didnt get to go 'trick-or-treat'ing the year after that.

one of the bigger problems adults have with halloween is the fact that small children often dress up as ghouls, pumpkins, witches, wizards or goblins. ive never understood why this upsets people. to a child its just fun to dress up. they dont care if they are dressed as a rabit, a cowboy or a ghost. they attach no satanic meaning to what theyre wearing. children just enjoy a good time and halloween is just one big party.

In the Life of...

2007-11-03T11:58:00.000+07:00

Apologies for the late entry. On top of losing my voice again, I just don't have anything to write about at the moment. This is something I wrote a long, long, long time ago. Before I moved here. I think it started out as a fanfic for something? I don't even remember...

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I was on top of the world and I liked it there. With already 15 movies to my credit I had been made the new queen of Hollywood in a just a few short years. You get used to it, you know. The “fame” thing. People screaming your name wherever you go, seeing your pictures on billboards and magazines, being the new “it” girl. Yeah. At 24 I’ve gotten more than I could’ve ever dreamed of. Except for the golden man. You would think that after four consecutive Oscar noms you would eventually win. The fame and money is a plus but the recognition and respect is what every real actor strives for. I promised myself when I was younger that I would get that statuette before I turned 26 (30 seemed like too big of a number). I’m not giving up just yet…

So what was on the agenda for today? Radio interviews, and then a press conference, and then a photo shoot. The rest of the day was free.

“Step on it, Henry. We’re running a bit late,” I cried. Henry, although a bit daft sometimes, was as reliable as a driver could get, and could maneuver us through the busy streets of New York better than anyone else around.

“You got it, boss,” he replied cheerfully. I don’t know how he does it. Put on that same smile everyday and mean it.

We took off through the busyness of the city and I found myself standing outside of the radio station. “You just finished a box-office hit. What’s next?” And then answering relentless question after relentless question at the press conference. “No, I will not be doing a romantic comedy with Will Farrell.” And then with a camera. “And pose. Smile. Good! Beautiful, beautiful!” It doesn’t take much to impress these photographers.

The day was just a big blur. As everything are these days. Not that it’s boring it’s just that after a while you tire of the game. Not that I’m complaining that I lead the life that I do. I was waiting for my break as an Oscar-winning actress but maybe I had to go looking for it myself. We were on the ride back home when my thoughts were interrupted by my phone.

“Hello?”

“Mel?” It was my manager and second father figure, David. He was the only person other than my parents who called me that.

“Who did you think it was?”

“Ok, good. Look, I’ve just received an important phone call from the people of MGM. I hope you’re free tonight because we want to discuss a possible movie role for you. This could be your award-winning break, baby!”

My tone remained unchanged. I had heard that phrase too many times before. “They want to talk about it over dinner? Can’t this wait?” I really had nothing to do that night but I was in no mood to sit through three hours of incessant blabber during the dinner. No way was I going to go through four more movies that were “Oscar-worthy” but ended up with nothing after the ceremony. It’s time to do things my way.

“Mr. Smith has a very busy schedule, Mel. I don’t think he can do it any other time. And he wants to get this mattered settled as soon as possible so they can start pre-production.”

“I don’t know…”

“I know you have nothing planned for tonight. You can’t escape out of this one.”

“Well, I guess if I have to -”

“Great! I’ll send you the directions in a few minutes. Be there by 7:00.” Beep. And he left me with that. Well, I guess my free night is off the agenda now.

I sighed, but who knows? He might be right this time. I forced myself to believe what I was saying. One dinner wouldn’t hurt. And I’m sure the world doesn’t want me to waste a perfectly good night eating ice cream and crying my eyes out on old black-and-white films.

Ecclesiastes 12:1

2007-11-03T02:56:00.000+07:00

Ecclesiastes 12:1
Remember your Creator in the days of your youth before the days of trouble come and the years approach when you will say "i find no pleasure im them".

I was recently going through a rough time, and a good friend of mine told me to take a look at this verse in the Bible. After reading it, i realised that i really have to be smart about my decisions and choices in life, especially in my teenage years, because if i dont, by the time i no longer want to be involved in those 'things that the youth are involved in' it could be too late. Soon, my time to be judged will come. Honestly, due to my past, im not looking foward to it, mainly it's fear.. and also guilt. Luckily for me, we have a forgiving God. He is LOVE, no one can change that, and therefore he can make anything happen. Although i am not looking foward to being judged, i still have time to change that. If i really want to, i can ask for forgiveness, i can be forgiven, and God will choose to 'forget' my sin.. he'll just put them away somewhere and pretend they dont exist. I can start with a clean slate, a fresh beginning, where my past sins dont really exist anymore. I have the chance to start using my years of youth for the best.

In saying this, i mean that instead of doing things to please myself, I have the chance to do things that please God. In pleasing God come many benefits. Not only will i feel good about myself and i will no longer have regrets, but it may also help me to earn Gods trust back; earn that relationship back that i havent been too involved in lately. Although some people may not believe in God, they have to know that there is something out there of a higher power. Everyone needs to have hope, and therefore they pray to God for things they want and need in their lives, even if they dont admit it. I've been through a phase in which i didnt believe in God, nor did i think about him or what he was thinking when i did certain things. Unfortunately, those things are the things that i regret most in my life, even if that was exactly what i wanted at that certain point in time. Those times were by far some of the worst emotionally painful times of my life. Thankfully, God is forgiving.. as I said before. If we truly want forgiveness, if we've messed up during our years of youth and want to redeem ourselves, we can. No matter what!

Memory of Daddy (a visual to go with the poam)

2007-10-30T22:40:00.000+07:00

The Days of Daddylessness

2007-10-30T21:53:00.000+07:00

Daddy, I miss you, plain and simple.

Please come back soon; I miss the days you’d squeeze my pimple.

Daddy, I miss you, clearly I do.

Please come back; I have a surprise for you.

Daddy, I miss you, like an Alaskan winter misses the sun.

Please come back; I’ll show you my report card that says I passed term one.

Daddy, I miss you, I miss our meaningful talks.

Please come back; they really rock my socks.

Daddy, I miss you, it’s so so true.

Please come back; I cry myself to sleep at night, I’m so so blue.

*** Kendal really really misses her dad who is currently in Bangkok recovering from knee and shoulder surgery =( ***

Alone

2007-10-27T00:35:00.000+07:00

I enjoy being alone. Not in the truly abnormal way that makes me seem like a freak - I just don't much enjoy the company of others too much. In other words, I'm a self-centered recluse.

For the most part I usually see others' faults as they are, and even with a manner of glorification to them. I am tolerant of them only because confrontation of those faults would lead to a domino effect of problems that would only increase my general irritation with people. And even with that, I can usually find the most scrutinizing quirks in everyone that will undoubtedly continue to annoy me.

Certainly I do have friends and enjoy their company, but not in the way that I truly appreciate their physical presence when I am with them, which is quite an appalling thing to say. It's probably a distressing and dreary thought to most, but I'm perfectly fine with my independence and dissociation from the real world. I feel superior to those who are so dependent on others. Those who cling to people like magnets and move from partner to partner as recklessly as driving the opposite way on a one-way street, so as to avoid the mere thought of being alone. If the connection to their life support was suddenly severed would they shrivel up like a parasite with no host to feed on?

What worries me is that I must change. What if I don't? For as long as I remember I've been this mold of a person. I assured myself that when I start my own family, when I finally love someone enough to commit myself to an eternity with them, I'll be different. Though it's still a far way off I have an uncanny feeling I'll still harbor this separation for quite some time.

There are innumerable stories of roaming singles who finally realize that they can't play around forever and that settling down with one person is a gift in itself. I certainly don't fit that mold but would I be able to appreciate the gift God gave Adam of company? Of course if God says so, that should be my main motivation to change myself, right?

I'm trying to care, but really I couldn't be less bothered with anyone but myself. Like I said, self-centered recluse.

I'd be a horrible mother.

And an even worse wife, no doubt.

Old vs. New

2007-10-26T18:08:00.000+07:00

so, term one just ended and letters were just sent home regarding failing grades. well since i was one of the recipiants of that letter i thought i would do a little comparing. you see, at my old school all you had to do to pass a subject was show up and b.s. your way through the tests and lectures. Maybe do a little sucking up to teachers and some homework once in a while and you were set...HA! that is not the case here and thats a good thing!!! everyone slacked off at my old school and it was like the school didnt even care...so why should we have cared? my last school only made you do the minimum..this school only excepts the maximum. my last school held assemblies about "the effects of cocain"(because half the school was shotting up drugs in the bathrooms), this school holds assemblies to show the effects of a life without God. At my last school our food in the caffeteria was a choice of pizza, pizza stick, or nachoes(not so healthy), SPH has a choice of..well alot more then that! my last school was all about helping the kids stay in school and off drugs!(because once again half of the school was shotting up drugs in the bathrooms), this school is all about building Godly character and teaching us hard work. my last school our morning class was only to catch up on the latest gossip and watch the crude morning show put on by the students, at this school morning class is for reading Gods word. so as you can see SPH is a universe different from my last school....THANK GOD! :p
~~Hana

A Helpful Holiday

2007-10-24T20:02:00.000+07:00

This past holiday was one of the most relaxing yet demanding holidays of my life. I was busy with all sorts of things. My parents were away for most of the holiday, and also my brother and my maid, so was pretty much woman of the house! Although there were some difficulties, for the most part, I enjoyed the freedom and serenity it gave me!
While my parents were in China and my maid pulang kampung, I was in charge of taking care of my apartment and dog, Sunshine, and was in charge of my brother also. This proved the most difficult task of the holiday! My brother, Jack, and I usually get along quite well but when our parents are away, we struggle with how to cop with each other. As his older sister, it is my duty to take the leadership role that my parents usually posses but Jack really doesn’t like that. For instance I would tell him to hurry up and change because we had to go and then I would leave the room. When I came back, he would still be watching TV! It really annoyed me because I had to continually repeat myself! And then he would get annoyed and say that I wasn’t his mom or dad and tell me to stop acting like them. So, from then on, I tried my best to not be too controlling and just let him do his own thing and let him feel the consequences on his own. I got a good taste of what parenting will be like!
On a lighter note, while Jack was gone to Bandung with his friends for four days, I had free reign! I made all my own decisions and didn’t have to wait on anyone but myself! At times I got kind of lonely but I always found something to do and someone to hang out with. I slept over a Zowie’s house without permission, invited friends over to my house, went to Ed’s birthday party and stayed as long as I wanted, went to a movie with Ed and his brother and sister, and of course, did housework and homework but that bit of work wasn’t that bad either! I think I got a good idea of what it will be like living on my own when I go to college!

written by kendal

Just for Fun

2007-10-22T18:36:00.000+07:00

Just to get this blog going again after two weeks of not posting.
For fun (x-posted from my FB and LJ).

The rules are simple: List (20) things you want to say to 20 people but know you never will. Don't say who they are.

1. You and your family may be the "perfect" Christians, but it's because of people like you that I turn away from the church.

2. Everytime I'm near you I make a fool of myself. I'm sorry, but maybe you didn't realize that not everyone can be blessed with your brains.

3. You mean more to me than anything else in the world and it breaks my heart to know that you're going on without me.

4. It truly bothers me that as much as I hate you, I'm the one who put you on your pedestal. You're not perfect.

5. Just because you're a PK doesn't mean you have to be so close-minded. Open your eyes.

6. I know you always said those things just to make me feel better. It's okay. We both knew who would make it in the end.

7. We were never close friends but you didn't have to completely ignore me once I left. Thanks for caring.

8. Though I have no justification for it, you can't believe how hurt I was when you asked my best friend and not me.

9. Sometimes I just want to really be a part of your world. But then I remember your friends and I know it isn't worth it.

10. You never noticed but I was always trying to impress you. Little as you were in my life.

11. High school crushes are overrated - get over yourself.

12. I'm sorry for third grade.

13. You're a b**** and as much of a jerk as he was he didn't deserve that. Yet eveyone's still on your side.

14. Even though it was years ago and you probably regretted it afterwards, thanks for saying it to me because you were the first. If you hadn't, I wouldn't have known what a great friend you could be.

15. You're my role model and always make me feel like I belong. Thanks.

16. I'm not sure what you saw in me but I was honored to be your 'favorite.'

17. Thanks for believing in me. Both you and your husband.

18. I'll forever be indebted to you for your kindness.

19. I've never been in love but you sure got me pretty close.

20. You never showed me you cared until I moved to the other side of the world. Nonetheless, I'm lucky to have you as a friend.

Food. -Laura

2007-10-05T22:27:00.001+07:00

I am an epicurian :D (woooooooh.. a new word)
I love every single type of food there is in the world. i like american, indonesian, italian, french, thailand-ese(?), indian, vietnamese... everything! so gooood but you know how all foods have there ups and downs? well, i think that american food has the most down sides to it that any other type of food there is. i mean, doesnt it just taste REALLY boring? when i go to the states for the holidays and spend over a week there, the food starts to make me feel nauseous. i mean, for the first couple of days, sure, the food is amazing. burgers, steak, fries, mashed potatoes. who wouldnt enjoy it? but as the days go by, all the food starts to taste the same; a blend of butter and fat. i think that im just used to the style of the asian cuisine where they use a lot of different spices to make the food interesting and yummy to eat, so when compared to american food, it tastes like heaven. the taste of american food is the equivalent to the taste of plastic. When my family and i decide to head to the states for holiday, we usually go to Michigan, and in michigan the range of food you can get is so limited that it is actually quite ridiculous. For breakfast it was always eggs, bacon, toast, pancakes, frech toast; lunch was sandwiches, cheese with crackers, and fruit; and dinner was either steak or hamburgers. imagine having to eat that everyday for 2 weeks with the occassional luxury of having pizza instead of sandwhiches for lunch. barf. now compare that to what an indonesian would eat. mie goreng for breakfast; nasi, kangkung, sate, nasi goreng or nasi campur for lunch; and dinner would be sop buntut, nasi uduk, rendang, ayam kuning or sayur asam. SO MUCH BETTER!!!! :D i guess if u have all that indonesian food every day for 2 weeks it would also get pretty sickening in the end, but not as sickening as eating bland, boring food. americans should explore the different tastes of the world and know what theyre missing out on. theyre so concentrated on their own country that I even saw a restaurant that was given the name, "SHANGHAI, Japanese Cuisine". wow.

another thing about american food that i have a particular frustration towards is the fact that they have so many forms of instant food. are americans really that lazy to not have the enegy to cook there own food? no wonder most of the american population is overweight. they eat chemical-packed instant food for most of their meals. instant pizza, instant tv dinner packages, instant sandwiches. how disgusting. what is so hard about buying ingredients to cook yourself a decent healthy meal?

people always make fun of the type of foods i like to eat because it doesnt fit with the way i look, but i cant help it if i think asian food tastes so much better than american food. this is one of the reasons i am dreading the thought of going to school in the US. im going to be staying there for much longer than 2 weeks at a time :(

Stream of Consciousness (Blurbs)

2007-10-04T22:33:00.000+07:00

[Edit: Since they're all thoughts, I figured I could combine them on one blog. Obviously, they don't all really connect with each other. Or at least, not enough to create a "real" entry.]

[10/6/07]
The problem with dreamers is they usually can't stop dreaming long enough to act on the brilliant imaginations in their mind. They plan and imagine great things for the future, but the roller coast ride comes to a deadening halt when reality sets in.

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As an "ex-perfectionist/overachiever," I know what it means to aim big and live by high standards. Failure is not an option, which is why you don't even consider what would happen "if I don't make it." I don't know what happened - maybe it was the move to a cliche private school in Southeast Asia where the majority of the students seem to perfectly fit the Asian stereotype mold - but I grew out of my perfectionist ways. More so, I began to mock them. Mock what I used to be (or tried to be, anyways). Perhaps, it was my loss of inspiration and passion, but I didn't see the point anymore. Nevertheless, I know you have to be determined and ambitious and set yourself seemingly impossible goals.

The other part of me is the dreamer. In that aspect, I often get caught up in my make-believe world and forget that hard work isn't given free with the overachiever package. In this case, the goals set are more elusive and a bit exaggerated.

They go together quite well, actually. You have to be a dreamer to think big and a sort of overachiever to make those dreams reality. The most important part you have to remember is to keep the balance though. If you dream too big for yourself, you're usually blinded by the prospect of that dream to think rationally enough to realize that you're hurting yourself more if you go through with it.

--------

Unfortunately, the greater the dream, the harder the fall. The worst part is the disappointment. Somewhere, in the bowels of your consciousness you knew that you probably would not have succeeded anyway, but those thoughts are drowned out by the shouts of chaos of your imagination. So, in response to those shouts you decide to go for it. And where in any other situation that would be considered a positive attitude it is not so for this.

[10/3/07]
I already had my opinions on such topics like abortion, homosexuality, euthanasia, cloning, and stem cell research before I had truly become a Christian. In fact, they were quite liberal.

Now, that I know exactly where I am spiritually and my position in God is more clearly defined to me I have accepted what the Bible teaches and what the church preaches on such topics like those. Honestly, both sides have their points. There must be a reason people hold on so dearly to their beliefs when dealing with these issues.

Does that mean that I'm simply accepting teachings that I might not necessarily believe in so I can 'be a Christian'? Doesn't that mean I'm lying to myself? Or am I now turning the blind eye to topics that might arouse personal opinions contradictory to the church so I won't compromise my position as a Christian?

Not a comforting notion but maybe my sense of morality was distorted to begin with...

{ 'Hot' Religious Topics }

Untitled. [zowie]

2007-10-03T14:35:00.000+07:00

When I lived in Australia I used to deal with alot of drama. From friend and family, to school and all that goes on. To deal with this drama i would write poetry. When I came to Indonesia I guess my creative side kind of died a little and I just didn't feel like writing anymore. But of course, as I got used to the whole idea of living here I began to write poetry again. Recently, I wrote a poem. I wouldn't consider it one of my best, but still, I'm proud of it. Especially considering the fact that I haven't been writing as much lately. Anyway, here it goes.

I know…

I know you have two hands,
I’ve held them, and they’ve held me.
So why don’t you use them?
Use them for something other than satisfying your own needs.

I know you have two eyes,
I’ve stared into them, and they’ve stared into mine.
So why don’t you use them?
Use them to see how I’ve fallen for you over this time.

I know you have lips,
I’ve kissed them and they’ve kissed me.
So why don’t you use them?
Use them for something other than lying about how you want things to be.

I know you have a heart,
I've felt it beating, and I've heard it too.
So why don’t you use it?
Use it to love me the way that I love you.

Have any of you ever believed something and then come to realize that it was all a complete lie? I know I have. Yes, this world is full of lies, but most are usually secret lies, done behind ones back. I know they are still lies, they're still sins, but in my opinion, those sort of lies don't hurt as much as those lies that are done right to your face! When somebody looks you in the eyes and says something, of course, in most cases, you'll believe them. But, if you come to realize that what they had said to you was a complete lie, things can get ugly, and when they do, emotions tend to get hurt. Liars tend to be fakes. And personally, I DISLIKE fakes. I'll admit, I've lied. But I don't live my whole life as a lie. I'm me. And people know that. But someone that pretends to be someone they're not, well that's just pathetic. Honestly. Anyway, just think about it. Is lying your way through life really worth the consequesnces that you'll have to deal with in the end? I don't think so.

The Bible

2007-10-02T21:46:00.000+07:00

The Bible is our handbook for each and every issue we come up against in life, it is the key to knowledge of what is right and wrong. Racism and prejudice corresponds directly to favoritism, treating others indifferently, and showing a lack of love, all of which are talked about in the Bible.
Favoritism has been one of man’s down falls in life from the beginning of time and leads directly to racism and prejudice. The Bible talks about favoritism numerous times, James chapter two being one of them. In his letter which purpose is to “expose unethical practices and teach right Christian behavior” (Student’s Life Application Bible), James says, “ My dear brothers and sisters, how can you claim that you have faith in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ if your favor some people more than others?” (James 2:1) Another example of partiality resulting in racism and prejudice is the conflict between God’s chosen people and gentiles. In the early era of Israel, the conflict between these two people groups was constant, they thought it was even scandalous to talk to gentiles. This is because the Jews thought they were more important than everyone else which lead to prejudice against Jews that continues to this day. Peter knew differently, though, in Acts 10:34, “Then Peter replied, ‘I see very clearly that God doesn’t show partiality.’”
“Treat others how you would like to be treated” is a statement that almost everyone has heard one time or another, in one way or another. It is not very surprising that this truthful remark originated from the Bible, more than once. Widely known in the Church as the Golden Rule, treating others like yourself is mentioned in Luke 10:27, Mark 12:31, Matthew 5:43-48, Leviticus 19:18, Matthew 22:39, and there are some many others references. It is a fact that human’s number one obsession is themselves and themselves is what they care about and think about the most. Obviously, if we all treated others how we wanted to be treated like the Bible tells us to, there would not be problems of racism and prejudice because everyone would love each other and find no faults in one another.
Love makes the world to round, it is what separates us from the animals, and it is God’s gift to each and every one of his creatures. The Bible says clearly and demonstrates God’s love for us a gazillion times stating all through the Bible that God’s love is unfailing, immeasurable, and never ending. In turn, it is our responsibility and privilege to love others as God loves us. In 1 John 4:7 and 8 says, “ Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is born of God and knows God. But anyone who does not love does not know God-for God is love.” When we truly love others, there is no room for hatred, jealousy, or any other wrong thoughts or actions that are racist or prejudice to God’s creatures.
Knowing all these things, and understanding what the Bible says is nothing without application. The Bible says we should be doers and not hearers. It is not enough to have 1st Corinthians 13, also known as the love chapter, memorized and be able to tell people God loves them and be as tolerant as possible. One needs to actually be the example and show complete love towards everyone. This is the only way that racism and prejudice can be overcome, it is the example of Jesus Christ himself that can help us oppose the disease known as discrimination.

By Kendal

Why I Do It

2007-09-29T10:06:00.000+07:00

I remember being ecstatic. My parents had troubled looks on their faces but there it was. The letter.
I had made it into one of them most prestigious summer ballet programs in the country.

Along with New York City Ballet (NYCB), American Ballet Theater (ABT) is one of the leading ballet companies in the US. If NYCB is the Harvard of the ballet world, ABT is the Yale. ABT itself conducts summer programs, or summer intensives as they are called, at five sites (listed according to the intensity of the program): New York, Michigan, Alabama, Texas, and California. Of course, the New York site was the most elite and the hardest to get into.

I disregarded the other acceptance letter I received that same day from Nutmeg Conservatory and focused in on the ABT letter. In my mind I was already picturing myself dancing in front of packed houses at Lincoln Center. I had gotten into my and the company's second choice: ABT Detroit Summer Intensive in Michigan, which was still a long way away from the New York site's prestige, but still pretty impressive to get into. Somehow I needed this confirmation from a place outside of my home ballet studio. Once you get too sheltered in one place you begin to wonder what credibility they can give you.

I arrived at the Wayne State University dorms, where we were being housed, excited beyond words and eager to learn. 'Hey,' I thought to myself, 'maybe that ballerina dream wasn't as far-fetched as I once thought it was.'

The first day of the program was used as placement day. And though I didn't do a spectacular class, I went out of the studios that day rather jubilant. I was in stark contrast with the rather haughty atmosphere that surrounded the girls around me. These were the rich, pampered, well-off, kids who had fake smiles and compliments for the teachers and would sooner backstab their 'best friends' to make it to the top. Loyalty was not a well-known attribute in these parts. I would imagine that it would have been a little friendlier in the Alabama, Texas, Cali sites where the competition is less fervent.

I seemed to make quite an impression on both the choreographers doing our workshop pieces for that session on the first day we met them, which was also the day they made their casting decisions. My prominence in the forefront of my level, however, was quickly extinguished as the program wore on. Though I still had my upbeat disposition, the classes grew heavier and all the more arduous for me. I struggled to just have a place in every class and my body became weary with fatigue. I had never before put myself through a program this intensive and I think I was overwhelmed both physically and mentally with the experiences. If I hadn't been too infatuated with just the thought of ABT I probably would have driven myself mad. There were times I struggled to find the inspiration to keep me going and had to persevere through exhaustion to give 110% everyday. I didn't say I succeeded in achieving that everyday but I sure tried.

The last week was the most hectic and tiring but that only heightened my elation. It was the week of run-throughs, dress rehearsals, and stagings and you could almost see the excitement in the air translate into the theater through the dancers. Despite having a mild fever at the beginning of that week and reworking my solo with a different pas de deux partner a few days before the performance because my original partner had gotten kicked out of the program three days before our performance date, I remained strong and optimistic. Whatever happened in those four weeks had no importance anymore. Or maybe they meant the world and would be the pinnacle of this experience that would culminate with two performances. Whatever it was that I decided on, I let it fill me and used it for my performance.

It was final day of the program, the performance day, and the day whizzed by until it slowed down just hours before the curtain went up. I always get excited before a performance. Excited and then suddenly nervous and nauseous for 20 minutes before the start of the performance. Then just the two seconds before I make my entrance the nauseating anxiousness evaporates and I am left with euphoria and exhilaration. It's something about the theater and the atmosphere and the blinding lights that when I step on the stage my mind becomes clear though at the same time hazy with the overflow of emotions in me. It's that feeling of being out of yourself. You don't think, you just do. You just dance.

Maybe it was the worst performance I had ever given, but at the moment all I could think of was the power that I had. Of the passion that consumed me. As if I were something bigger; as if I were someone who had the world at her feet. I was flying and all I could see were the stars above me. The world below had disappeared and there was no way of getting me back down for a while.

Throughout the course of the performance when I was on stage a thought came to me:

"Oh yeah... This is why I dance."

College. - Laura

2007-09-29T06:58:00.001+07:00

Life is going by so fast that im starting to get really really freaked out about it. i remember being in 7th grade, thinking nothing about colleges, SATs, college apps, like it was yesterday. ive watched all my brothers go through the IB program, suffering their way everynight trying to meet their deadline and ive always thought to myself "im so glad thats not me. i dont have to do that till im old." that was three years ago!!!! and it went by like a flash.

A few days ago i was looking through the mail that was just put on the dinner table, when i came across a couple letters that where addressed to me. "woah, thats wierd" i thought, "i never get mail." i quickly tore open the envelopes and pulled out the cards that were inside them. They were all from different colleges in the US trying to convince me that their college was the one to go to. That freaked me out. For some reason, getting mail from colleges made me realize that i couldnt play around anymore. i have to grow up. all these years leading up until now, ive had the mentality that everything would be alright and things would work out fine for me, whatever i did. Mom and Dad had everything under control and if anything went wrong, they'd take care of me. how stupid. my future depends on how much effort i put into my work today. Mom and Dad cant type my essays, cant do my presentations, cant write my exams. i have to. what becomes of my life depends on me alone. Because it took me so long to understand this (i admit im rather slow :D) i had to make up for so many years of "dumbness" in the spand of a couple days. i had to completely change my mindset. At times, thinking about all this has put so much pressure on myself to do well at school that its making me want to explode but i always try and convince myself that its worth it. suck it up for now, tolerate it, and later on in life you'll be glad you didn't give up.

But no matter what, i will always miss the times where i had no homework. I will always miss the times where i didnt have to take notes in class.

I will always miss the time when life was simpler.

Heavy Heart

2007-09-27T23:20:00.000+07:00

Why am I always the one in the way,
the one who complicates things,
the one who always has to end it?

Three hearts I’ve hurt, lasting wounds.
And I’m reminded daily of the pain I’ve caused,
unknowingly, unintentionally.

Pieces here and there,
my heart and theirs.

Lasting memories of when it was good.

Then suddenly, everything is turned up side down.
one at a time, over the course of a year,
it’s overwhelming.

I see all of their faces,
all different but one emotion unites them against me.

They are hurt, confused,
“what went wrong” they ask.

A river of tears for each.
I weep over what’s been lost.

And yet the river,
it isn’t my tears,
it’s theirs.

They are the ones who bare pain on my behalf,
who gave love and received a heavy heart.

By Kendal M.
Sept. 26th, 2007

'Titles' by zowie.lee.mcc

2007-09-27T17:54:00.000+07:00

This week I've been thinking alot about 'titles'. The main thing I had in mind was titles given to relationships. Although girl-boy relationships are given various titles, I, on the other hand, have been thinking alot about friendship titles.

When a friendship is given a title, for example 'best friends' or 'sisters' even, if you get into some sort of routine calling this person your 'best friend', after a while it just sticks, even if the actual meaning behind it doesn't really exist anymore. All relationships (im talking about friendships in particular) in life face some sort of problem, it could be something really minor, or something completely major, either way, there will be problems! Although alot of friendships face these problems and get through them with their title and the meaning behind the title still in tact, some friendships just aren't as strong, and they can only handle so many problems before the meaning behind the title kind of just... disappears. Yes, the title still stands, the words are there, but beneath that lies absolutely nothing.

Situations like these often confuse me. I mean, I know there are many things in life that are said to be 'more important' but actually... friendships and relationships that consist of love and care are actually one of the most important things in life. Without love, life would not be worth living, honestly. But then again, if you're in a friendship that is talked about as if it is full of 'love' when really that 'love' isn't so strong and the real friendship under the title is non-existent, then something has to be done! The only thing is... how? I mean, think about it! If your 'best friend' were to come up to you and say "hey, you know, i think things have changed. Maybe we say we're best friends, but actually, we aren't, are we?!" It's not like you'd reply "Yeah, for sure! Let's just call the whole thing off!" Because if you were to say something like that, you'd be the one who looks bad. Therefore, instead of saying how you really feel about the situation you'd reply "Huh? What do you mean? You're my BEST FRIEND! Our friendship is so much more than just a title!" The only thing with that is the fact that the friendship is then turned into a complete LIE!

In a situation like this, I wouldn't know what to do. Just because i wrote this, it doesn't necessarily mean that I'm in this situation, but I will admit that I've been in a situation similar to this in the past. Unfortunately, that situation wasn't resolved. I wouldn't say I'm still dealing with it, but I am still dealing with the whole 'title' thing being stuck in place the way that it is. But I guess everything happens for a reason, right?! So maybe, just maybe, something good, will come out of something as deceitful as a lie.

Are We Willing?

2007-09-25T21:38:00.000+07:00

Ok so i know that my last blog was spiritual also, but this just has to good of a message to keep to myself.
....READ ON...

If You Want Me To
By: Ginny Owens

The pathway is broken
And the signs are unclear
And I dont know the reason why you brought me here
But just because You love me the way that You do
I will go through the valley
If You want me to

CHORUS:
Now I'm not who I was
When I took my first step
And I'm clinging to the promise
You're not through with me yet
So if all of these trials bring me closer to You
I will go through the fire
If You want me to

It may not be the way I would have chosen
When you lead me through a world that's not my own
But You never said it would be easy
You only said I'll never go alone

So when the whole world turns against me
And I'm all by myself
And I can't hear You answer my cries for help
I'll remember the suffering Your love put You through
And I will go through the valley
If You want me to

..............................
Alright..now that you have read it..
I seriously love this song so much! I happened upon it when i was in the middle of moving here to Indonesia and was having a serious mental breakdown and freaking out at God for making me come here. I mean this place is EONS different from where i lived before. But as i was listening to this song i just thought...."WOW God, I have been so selfish and unfair to you for thinking that i know whats best for me". This song always puts me back into perspective. I mean if we are afraid to step outside of our comfort zone for Jesus or be a light for Him in a dark place then it seems like we do not even care about all of the stuff that He went through to save us. It just reminds me of how much God loves us and we need to always trust in him. And obviously it was a good thing that I gave into God and accepted Him bringing me and my family here..or else i would not be writing thin blog :p. Ok well that is really all I have to say. Just wanted to give u guys the song to...listen to it...its GOOD! Ciao...<3

~~Hannah

Untold Story (The Reason Why)

2007-09-25T20:12:00.000+07:00

I’ve created a monster. And I don’t know what to do. There is a story behind the story that most people don’t know. The story that has been told is misleading and contradictory to the story that has been left in the shadows. I’ll shine the light.

I liked this guy, genuinely had a crush on him. I loved the attention he gave me and the kindness and curiosity he showed towards me. He was sweet to say the least. The coolest part was that he liked me back and it showed. He asked me on my first date (ever!) and after that first date we started hanging out more and more. He was my first valentine and I thought he was a dream come true. He really liked me, I could tell. I liked him too. I started to wonder what was to come of it, were we going to be together forever, was he the one? This thought scared me, things were moving too fast, I didn’t know what to do. Should I distance myself, try to slow us down, put up the stop sign? I prayed earnestly day after day. My feelings for him lessened and I knew God was helping me let go. The last day of school I shared this verse with him:

“I want you to promise, O women of Jerusalem, not to awaken love until the timing is right.” Song of Songs 8:4

I explained that it wasn’t the right timing for us, that we needed to cool it. He told me he understood and agreed. I thought that was that. Time to turn the page.

The summer passed by full of new experiences and new friendships. School started back up and everything was normal. He and I were friends, nothing more, nothing less.

Now another guy has entered the picture. Some people have jumped to conclusions. They think we are ‘together’. At this point in time, we are not ‘together’. Is it a crime to like a guy? Some people understand, some don’t.

Now I’m being ridiculed for leaving the past the past. I’ve turned the page, started a new chapter, and some people keep looking back as if they are waiting for the past to change. It doesn’t happen that way. I don’t always make the right decisions. But who does? Emotions are ever changing, that’s why crushes come and go. Some people give more of themselves than others. Some hold on longer. Many people get hurt. That’s what happens. That doesn’t make me a heartless person, I wish people would understand that.

written by kendal

2007-09-22T17:41:00.000+07:00

sorry this post is a day late.. i didnt have time to write it last night because i took my 3 hours to get home from school after watching the basketball games so when i finally reached home all i had time for was to take a shower and rush out the door to meet up with my family to have dinner.
here's my post!

i hate being ignored. when people hear that im the youngest in my family and im the only girl, besides my mom, they automatically think im the one that gets all the attention. they couldnt be more wrong. Because i am the youngest, i get ignored the most and being a girl doesnt make it any better. i know that most women try to make themselves believe that women and men are equal, but theyre not. this is a male dominant world and unless a woman is REALLY important or REALLY pretty, they hardly get noticed. Anyway, back to what i was saying.. everytime there is a group discussion in my family about a matter that involves all of us, my input doesnt mean anything. i think they dont even hear me talk. if i say something there's no reaction from anyone of them and even if i repeat what i said, there's still no reaction!! at first i thought it was just me.. maybe im just being too senstive about this but then some thing happened that made me 100% sure that it wanst just me and that they were ignoring me much more then any other family member. it happened during dinner at sushi sei when i asked my mom a question (i forgot what). i successfully got her attention and she was looking straight at me so i thought it was okay to ask her the question (i try to avoid every possible situation to make it easy for a family member to ignore me so i make sure they have their full atention before i go ahead and say something to them). After i finished asking the question, my mom inhales and begins to answer me but then turns her head and talks to someone else. WHAT?!?!?!?!??! how is that even possible..
then, i figured out the trick. the only way my mom, my dad, or my brothers would pay attention to me is if i got their attention by speaking in a loud low voice. that is solid proof that people are willing to pay more attention to men than to women! as annyoing as it is, its fact. but even then, i refuse to get there attention that way so now ive just stuck to waving my hands in the air and making really weird noises. i hope as i get older my family will be nice enough to at least pretend to listen to what i have to say :D or i will be 'important' enough to get noticed.. maybe i should become a brain surgeon.

Assessment of Art

2007-09-22T17:12:00.000+07:00

Can the arts be graded?

If art is a medium in which creativity and expression pours out of how can it have a standard at which it is judged? Isn't each individual's creativity and expression subject to that individual's standards?

For one, I've often wondered why figure skating is considered a sport first (granted, it's one of my favorites).
The marks scheme is split into two: technical elements and artistry. The technical marks are pretty straightforward, you either nail it or you don't (landing two-footed or not making the complete revolutions count as not making it, obviously) but the marking of a skater's artistry is very subjective. Certainly, it's not possible to judge them fairly on that. The act of administering these points in the first place implies that one skater's artistry is "better" than another's. On what basis is this skater's better than the next? Her facial expressions are more exaggerated and so that means her artistry is far superior? When in fact the interpretations of both skaters are different, they are now being ranked in a discreditable manner - always being biased to one of them a little more than the other.
What was worse was when the old ISU points mark system was still in use. It was then possible for a gifted skater to get a "perfect" score: 6.0 for technical elements and 6.0 for artistry. 'Perfect artistry'... seems a bit funny don't you think?

Most of the time, if not all of the time, art is very relative; its boundaries of what is right and wrong don't ever seem to be clearly defined. What one person finds vulgar and distasteful another could find audacious and innovative. Thus the reason for the number of controversies in art as well.

This problem is now, for me, more evident in the art classes at school. Apparently, it's possible for a student to be marked down because their work does not match the definition of art as is accepted by the teacher or textbook. Or for a teacher to decimate an artwork because she "doesn't like the effect" of what the student was doing. A bit harsh when compensating the fact that maybe that student used all four periods the class was given to work on the assignment creating something she truly believed was "acceptable".

Definition from Dictionary.com
art1 [ahrt] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation –noun

1.	the quality, production, expression, or realm, according to aesthetic principles, of what is beautiful, appealing, or of more than ordinary significance.

I remember in 8th grade our art class also debated and discussed about the definition of art, so I guess one could go off on another tangent arguing what is and is not art.
For another blog perhaps...

And maybe none of this makes sense. Just thoughts from an exhausted and frustrated person who believes music exams are a waste of time and money (what do you use them for anyway? college applications? résumés? personal gratification?).

Teenage Years - [zowie]

2007-09-22T02:16:00.000+07:00

Has there ever been a time in your life when you feel as if you don't belong? As if, although there are so many people surrounding you, you just don't seem to fit right with any of them? I'm pretty sure that almost everyone has felt that way at some point in their lives.. and if you haven't yet, you will! I hate the feeling of displacement, as if you've just been put bang smack in the middle of a group of strangers. It is by far one of the worst feelings, ever!

It's 2:16 in the morning and I'm still wide awake. Just thinking about the various situations and emotions that i have faced in this past week is actually a fair bit to grasp! Maybe some of you will be like "oh, here we go again.. zoe's gonna start pouring her heart out over the internet" but actually, that's not what I want to write about. I just want to write about the general, very broad topic of someone being 'left out'. Overtime, things change - especially during the adolescent years because our hormones are going absolutely crazy! But I mean, why is it that one minute you can feel completely satisfied with life - school is fine, family is fine, friends are fine... and then all of a sudden, your mood switches, and you feel as if you just don't fit in anywhere? Basically it feels as if you just don't belong.

This whole teenage thing is really starting to get to me. Nothing seems right anymore... in my mind life would be so much easier if we could fast foward the teenage years, finish school, finish university, get a job... and live happily ever after. Rumor has it that the teenage years are some of the best that you'll ever have. Now, I don't know who came up with that 'theory' but if these years are the best years I'm kind of not looking foward to growing up. Okay, back to my topic of people being 'left out'. I wonder why we feel that way. In most cases nothing has changed, life is just as usual, but inside we feel different. It must be the hormones, I mean, it HAS to be. Otherwise why are there so many depressed people in the world? Yes, things go wrong, but if people get so depressed that they start trying to commit suicide, it has to be the hormones that send their minds crazy, which is pretty sad... because that means that it could happen to any of us.

One day - happy. Next day - dead.

Perfect Timing

2007-09-18T19:30:00.000+07:00

A few weeks ago in homeroom we read Ecclesiastes 3:1-8. It is a very good and thought provoking verse and since then I can’t seem to quit relating something to it. The verse goes like this....

1There is a time for everything and every season under the sun;
2A time to be born and a time to die…
A time to plant and a time to uproot…
3A time to kill and a time to heal…
A time to tear down and a time to build...
4A time to weep and a time to laugh…
A time to mourn and a time to dance…
5A time to scatter stones and a time to gather them...
A time to embrace and a time to refrain…
6A time to search and a time to give up…
A time to keep and a time to throw away...
7A time to tear and a time to mend…
A time to be silent and a time to speak...
8A time to love and a time to hate…
A time for war and a time for peace.

This verse is so uplifting. Especially for those of us in the IB program. Some nights when I have uber amounts of homework but and all I want to do it get on msn or facebook I just remember this verse and think to my self, “ok Hannah this is your time to study…time for msn will come later ☺” hahaha. Corny I know but it really does help knowing that God made a time for everything and it is our job to rise to the occasion and do things in there time. I am a person who likes to rush things and move quickly, sometimes I think that I can get things done on my own faster or wonder why something has not happened yet. But keeping this verse close to my heart just gives me little reminders all day that everything will happen in God’s timing because he is never late. Isn’t that so great to know? It just makes you stop and thank him for all that he has done in His perfect timing doesn’t it?

Well looks like its my time for my 5 o’clock Indo lesson ☺. Hope this verse is as reassuring to you as it is to me!! Ciao!

~Hannah

Things Fall Apart

2007-09-17T19:53:00.001+07:00

Have you ever felt like no matter what you do, it's never good enough? Like the people around you are all blind to your struggles so they just keep pushing you non-stop and soon you'll either blow up or dissolve under the pressure?
Well. if you have, then just know that you're not alone.
About three weeks ago, I was having a bit of a power struggle with my parents and I guess part of it had to do with recently turning seventeen. Weird, I know, but I think it was pretty much the crux of the problem.
This is how it went. I turned seventeen and decided I should be treated more like an adult and have more privileges. Made sense to me but my parents certainly took it the wrong way!
An example of one of these 'grown up' things I thought I had risen up to was dating. Now, my dad is very fatherly, as in, very protective of his little girl (me) and so the when I started having crushes many MANY years ago, he said I would be able to date when I turned sixteen. Right..that was last year! When I turned sixteen last year I brought up the dating thing but of course, dad was like "I think it's a little to early..blablabla..(not a bad 'blablabla', important stuff)" I was understanding and actually agreed that I was still too young and also rededicated my life.
That was last year.
I wasn't any more mature or 'date ready' when I started eleventh grade. In fact, life seemed so smooth that I started slacking off, pretty bad for the first month of school. But then again, school started pretty slow and there wasn't much to do, lots of free study periods and nights devoid of homework. I guess I had too much time on my hands, too much time to daydream. No homework, easy school days, hardly any extra curricular activities to busy myself with, lots of time to hang out with friends, and someone 'liked' me! Life was good, great!
So I thought.
Little did I know, the 'sweet life' was eating away at me like maggots eating away a dead body, little by little but oh so destructive. When school started getting more difficult and the homework started to pile and friendships started to get complicated, I started to withdraw from my parents. I was an adult, I could deal with it...yea right, Miss Seventeen.
Things were falling apart..and I was the problem. Seclusion was my ally.
Thankfully (totally understated), God gave us parents and my parents finally gave me a talking to and straightened out my attitude. They understood both my struggles and my immaturity. They say letting go is the hardest part and I totally agree. Letting go of my stubbornness and letting my parents do their job was difficult but in the end very freeing.
The whole dating thing, I'll just cool it and let things happen in their right timing. Besides, God's in control and He knows what's best.
And the whole 'mature' thing, I still have a whole bunch of maturing to do, that's for sure!
So yea, sometimes people just don't understand, unintentionally burst your bubble or get in your space but is that really what's happening? Maybe it's you. Maybe you just don't realize that the things in your life that are falling apart are because of you. It's a hard thing to admit, but once exposed, freedom is at your finger tips.

written by kendal

scaryyy -Laura

2007-09-14T16:16:00.000+07:00

I've always had a fear of ghosts and no matter how hard i tried, i couldn't convince myself to believe that they weren't real. This whole fear started when my family started to force me to watch horror movies with them when i was at the age of 8 because they thought it would make me a "tougher" person. YEAH RIGHT! After watching my first horror movie, I was never the same. You know in ghosts movies there are certain scenes where you know something scary's going to pop out? It's always the scene in the bathroom, isn't it? Either the ghost pops out from behind when the character of the movie is looking in the mirror, or the ghost appears in the stall when the door is opened. So in result, the bathroom became the scariest place on earth for me. I refused to go into the bathroom alone no matter where I was- may it be at home, at school or even at a restaurant. It was ridiculous.

Anyway, a couple years ago, after months of hard work, I was FINALLY successful in making myself believe that these supernatural beings were just make believe (with the reasoning that i had never once seen a ghost throughout the 13 years i have lived on this earth) but then my brother had to come and burst my bubble. It was about something that happened to him the night before. (I am not 100% sure that he was telling the truth but I am pretty sure he was, because you could just see how scared he was when he was telling the story. He even kept the light on when he wanted to go to sleep that night. That in itself already creeped me out. So the story went like this:

It was around 12:30 in the morning when my brother decided to leave the house to meet up with his friends that were parked down the street. The street lights were dim and all he could hear were the distant movements of traffic. "Where's the car?", he thought to himself, "Oh, its probably around the bend". As he continued walking towards the end of the street, he started to have this feeling like someone was watching him. He stopped walking and slowly looked around to see if he could spot anyone. It took him about 5 minutes before he saw him. The man was standing about 10 meters away from my brother inside the gates of one of the houses that he passed. My brother could only see the silhouette of the man but he could tell that he was staring straight at him. "What's his problem?" my brother said to himself as he started walking again. As my brother neared the car, he turned to look at the man again, and thats when he noticed it. The man had no legs. My brother stood there, staring back at the man, frozen in fear for what seemed like an eternity. It wasn't until he heard the distinct voices of his friends calling his name, that he started to sprint to the car.

After my brother got back from the party and was in his room, getting ready for bed, his mobile started ringing. He looked at the caller ID and it read "Home". "Thats weird" he said to himself, "I thought everyone was already asleep". As his mobile continued to ring, he peeped through the blinds of his room to look at the part of the house that the house phone was located in. There was no one there. His mobile continued to ring and chills started to run up and down his spine.

Maybe there is such a thing as ghosts after all.

Butt Breathing

2007-09-12T20:40:00.000+07:00

Truth is stranger than fiction: Butt-breathing

Turtles can breathe through their butts. They can suck water into their cloaca, the single hole through which they pass feces, urine and sexual fluids, and into two pockets that come off the chamber. These pockets are lined with veins, and the turtles can absorb oxygen from the water into their blood. The Fitzroy River turtle from Australia seems to be the champion of butt breathing. It can pump water in and out of its butt up to 60 times a minute, and gets almost 70 per cent of its oxygen in this way.

seeeee!!! Hahahaha..it's true!! Research it yourself!

kendal

Waiting in the Wings :) [zowie]

2007-09-12T17:50:00.000+07:00

Just yesterday after basketball practice, Kendal and I were walking home and she started singing a song that she couldn't remember the name of but wanted me to hear. When we got to her house she turned on her iPod and told me to listen to this song called "Waiting in the Wings" by Point of Grace. While I was listening to it there was a few lines towards the end of the song that really stood out to me.

Waiting in the Wings - Point Of Grace
Hearts of hope
Seem hard to find these days
As darker deeds
Have their time on center stage

We watch it all
Unfolding scene by scene
And a happy ending
Seems a fading dream

Fear and desperation have their day
At least until faith steps up to say

Chorus
I believe – though God is out of sight
He's working in the middle of all things
Evil may have its time in the spotlight
But love is waiting in the wings
Love is always waiting in the wings

It's your life
As it plays out don't forget it
Heartache comes
But the stories not done yet

When shadows come, your courage wants to fade
But in a moment, everything can change

Chorus

There's always
More to any story
Than just what's here and now
There's not one
Hopeless situation
That can't be turned around

Chorus

Those particular words "there's not one hopeless situation that can't be turned around" really shout out to me. I mean, this whole song has great meaning, but those few words right towards the end seem as if they literally reach out and grab my attention. It makes me think about everything that I have been through, and all of those 'problems' that seem to be absolutely impossible to solve. Although at the time they make me want to crawl up into a little ball and die, they aren't actually all that bad. They can be solved. Of course it will take time. But no matter how much time it takes, any hopeless situation can be turned around. Recently, some things have been happening that i haven't been dealing with too well. I'd come to a point where I'd completely given up, although deep down inside I wanted to keep trying to make things better. For about a month I didn't 'attend' to this problem of mine, I just let it be, and of course, it went nowhere. After hearing this song, I began to think that maybe I shouldn't give up just yet. Those lines play over and over in my head, giving me the strength to believe that anything is possible, as long as you're willing to dedicate time, effort and a whole lot of deep thought into it. I myself have realized that just reading these lyrics don't do a whole lot, but if you listen to the actual song, I'm sure that at least a few lines will really stand out to you. Depending on the happenings taking place in your life, the 'stand outs' will vary, but I'm absolutely sure, that no matter who you are, this song will be able to give you just that tiniest push to make your curiosity flare, leading you to have just a little more faith in the 'Big Man Upstiars' :)

BTW

2007-09-11T16:24:00.000+07:00

PS...that last one was by hannah....sorry. OH and i dont know why it posted the name all those times but sorry for that too! ok now that i sound like a canadian ( :p haha just kidding ) im gonna go study!
~hannah

MY MOVIE MOMENT

2007-09-11T15:53:00.000+07:00

You know when you are watching a movie and something happens to the character and you think "haha that sucks! Good thing that wasn't me!" Things always happen in movies that we think could NEVER happen to us, right? Well from now on I will always feel for the character that gets embarrassed or something because I now know how they feel!
The other day at Coffee Bean i decided that i had to go to the bathroom...but since the place doesn't have one me and Kendal had to walk down and around the corner. well after trying not to let my purse touch the nasty floors in the stall and plugging my nose at the gross sewer smells that pollute the bathrooms here...i came out to wash my hands. As i am washing though i notice that these little ladys keep looking at me funny, but hey I'm a bule so maybe that is what they are looking at. As i turn to leave Kendal shrieks and grabs my arm. Thinking that there is like some rodent or bug on me a also start to freak out. Then i realize what Kendal is really yelling about....my skirt is TOTALLY tucked into my underwear. YEA....it was bad..
So i quickly fix it but it is too late, the ladys are already laughing hysterically and i am already turing red. I laugh it off and me and Kendal make our way back to the Coffee Bean in tears we are laughing so hard. Can you imagine if kendal wouldn't have been with me?? I WOULD HAVE WALKED ALL THE WAY BACK TO COFFEE BEAN WITH HALF A SKIRT ON!! Ugh just thinking about that makes me cringe! How embarrassing!!!!!!! But anyways it is a good memory now, and i will always, always, ALWAYS check my skirt before coming out of a bathroom again!

Attention All Languid Scholars

2007-09-10T22:24:00.000+07:00

I think intelligent people take a lot for granted.
Sometimes they just simply don't understand how hard it is for someone who may not be that bright to look at a concept and just not get it.

The biggest thing is when they don't use it. I have known quite a handful of intelligent people (as in facts-intelligent) who have gone through their school years joking around with their "gang" buddies in the back of the classroom just barely scraping by when I know these people have higher IQ's than me, a former scholar roll student. With insight like no other, the theories and concepts just 'click' in their head. They don't try at all yet get grades that I have to work three times as hard for.

I don't blame them for that, because if I were them I would be the same.

My best friend in middle school was the top student in our grade. You can call her the valedictorian, I guess (for middle school). I can name at least 7-9 people in that graduating class who were smarter than her, including me and I'm not exceptionally bright. Despite that, she still got the award. She was an extremely hard worker, always putting 110% into everything she did. She spent countless hours studying and reviewing notes. Her projects were always over the top. She was a natural born leader but would not exactly make the best brains for an operation. She was involved in a lot of extra-curriculars and took her opportunities as they came to her. She was a phenomenal student and all the teachers reaped her praises. All the extra work she put in almost - almost - put her on equal footing with her smarter superiors. Recently, she got a scholarship to join a summer study tour in Italy this past holiday break.

I can say I'm jealous and she's lucky, but she worked hard for that luck.
Saying that though, you just have to laugh and think to yourself where those lazy, smart people would be if they put in as much effort as my friend did. It's frustrating to know that these people don't have to study, after not having paid attention in classes, and can still get a 90% on a math test and make me feel stupid during relatively easy science labs.

Well, that certainly makes me feel pretty pathetic.

EDIT: Forgot my random linkage of the week (nothing to do with this post) - {here}

Gay Marriages: Think Deep

2007-09-10T20:03:00.000+07:00

Whether or not gay marriages should be allowed and tolerated is a touchy subject in today's society.
Here are some facts that may make you think twice about same-sex marriage and homosexuality.

- Homosexuals were not born that way; there is no homosexual genetic component in our DNA.

- Statistically, children and adults inside of traditional marriage are much better off socially, physically, financially, mentally, and emotionally than those of same-sex marriages.

- Homosexuals are not a class of people, why classify people by sexual desires? You will find many former homosexuals, you will never find a former African-American.

- An orientation towards homosexuality doesn't make the behavior morally right anymore than an orientation toward violence makes gay bashing morally right.

- Opposition to inter-ethnic marriage is without merit. Men and women are designed for one another, so inter-ethnic couplings are helpful. But homosexual couplings go against the natural design and are therefore harmful.

- Everyone has the same right to marry the opposite sex;homosexuals don't like their choices and thus want special rights.

- If homosexuals are granted special rights, on what grounds can we deny special rights for consenting adults who desire other socially destructive or unhealthy relationships such as polygamy or incest?

- They say, "But we love each other!" What's loving about medically dangerous behavior? Love seeks the ultimate good of the loved one.

These facts/arguments have come from Frank Turek, the author of Legislating Morality and I Don't Have Enough Faith to Be an Atheist. Learn more about big issues like this from his website: www.ImpactApologetics.com

I'm telling you, this stuff is important. We are the future. Let's get the facts straight for a better future.

kendal

Turtle Butts

2007-09-10T19:32:00.000+07:00

Did you know turtles can breath through their butt? Is that so not fair or what?? I wonder why God didn't create us with that same bootylious feature??

Well, this is a pretty fine topic in my opinion so I'll go ahead and dissect the idea.

If we could breath out of our butts, we wouldn't have to worry about being smothered in the face.
If we could breath out of our butts, we'd have another esophagus type thing, the more the better!
If we could breath out of our butts, it would be easier to exercise because we wouldn't run out of breath as easily.

But...

If we could breath out of our butts, things would be more complicated "down there".
If we could breath out of our butts, it would be more difficult to swim under water.
If we could breath out of our butts, we would have to have different kind of pants to accommodate our breathing passage.

In short, there are pluses and minuses to both being able and not being able to breath through our butts like turtles. I'm sure God had an extensively important reason why he didn't give us breathable butts. I don't know about you, but I'm glad he didn't!

(kendal)

What I Never Realized Before Today. -Laura

2007-09-10T17:45:00.000+07:00

Okay, right now I'm supposed to be doing my history homework thats supposed to be due in tomorrows lesson but i cant bring myself to do it! I simply hate history. So, I am going to write the blog that was meant to be written last week but about a topic that just came to me a couple minutes ago.

In this morning's devotion, I was sitting at my desk, looking at Mr. Eric while he was reading a passage from the Bible like he usually does in the mornings, but then something he read aloud caught my attention. It was from the book of Genesis.

"..she ate some of the fruit. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her. He ate it too. At that moment, their eyes were opened.."

I don't know why this passage decided to catch my attention this time, when in fact it has been read to me again and again over the years, but i found that the word choice that was used to explain how sin was taking ahold of Adam and Eve, was rather odd. Usually when people choose to use the words "their eyes were opened", they are trying to illustrate something good happening. If I didn't know any better, I would interpret the action of Adam and Eve eating the fruits from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil as something good because their "eyes were opened". To me, this changes the whole meaning of the story of Adam and Eve. It makes it seem like God wasn't allowing Adam and Eve to think on their own. He was clouding their thoughts so that they could not think to sin, but the serpent was able to convince them to eat the fruit of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil so that their eyes could be opened.

Maybe God did intend for us to live like robots, to live with clouded minds so that we do not know what is our right from out left. We would just live our lives, blindly praising and serving God with all out hearts. But the serpent ruined His great plan by convincing Adam and Eve to eat the fruits of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.

I actually don't believe this to be true but I couldn't help but wonder.

DONT GRADE! -Laura

2007-09-10T17:21:00.000+07:00

don't grade the one i wrote about the gay marriages!! i didnt even want that posted but my dumb friends decided it would be funny to add on "(excuse for actual belief)" and post it for everyone to see. geez..

gay marriages by Laura

2007-09-07T16:45:00.000+07:00

i dont know why i agreed to write about gay marriages but i have nothing else to write about and my friends suggested it to me (excuse for actual belief).

The thought of it does not offend me anyway i believe that any person has a choice to love anyone. Although in America they dont approbate man to man relationships, as it is utterly unconventional to our knowledge. Maybe, the thought of it doesn't coincide with our understandings, and people do not approve of it as the concept of homosexuality is believed to be immoral.

In modern society, homosexual and mixed partner marriages are discriminated. People, in general, i think are morally repulsed by homosexuality. This leads to the thought of no respect to free rights in this society. Free rights enables us to do anything possible for example now students like me can talk back to their elders and can overthrow the postion we were once at centuries ago.

According to the Bible, in the beginning, God created man and woman to breed, however this perspective has been completely distorted in modern society. Christians still do not approve of this, but i believe differently, because as people say, "love is between two people" and people is not justified, so it can be a man or a woman.

'Jersey Boys' Response

2007-09-06T23:04:00.000+07:00

People's lives often make good material for movies, stage shows, books, and art. How many new conceptions of the 'Last Supper' have we seen in this lifetime? Those people who were lucky or unfortunate enough to have their lives immortalized in media have had stories worth telling and tales worth experiencing. Some of the things these people go through you just have to wonder, "Man, how'd that work out?" Because despite everything - everything going against them, everything going for them - they make it out in the end. Maybe as a complete failure, maybe as a total hit. Whatever the case, their lives were worth noting.

Most of what's out there now is fluff. And don't think that it's only E! that's rolling out all of the rubbish...

There are stories out there though, of a different kind. Some of these other stories, whether you may agree with them or disapprove of everything that they stood for, can touch you in a place somewhere deep that you would have never expected to be rattled. Looking at it pragmatically, you wonder why such a story could bring tears to your eyes. It's the normal fame, sex, drugs, and rock and roll. Why does it make a connection with something within you? Hasn't everything that could be said, been said?

There's just something about it that connects with us, but we can't quite put a finger on it. It moves us to bits and shatters our defensive wall into pieces. It screams out, "Hey! I'm talking to you!" and how can you possibly ignore that when the voices are so mesmerizingly close. Funnily enough they don't stalk you down the street. They stand as a wallflower as you do a double-take and only after much internal debate with yourself do you decide to go check out what else they have to say to you.

Most people tune in expecting to hear something profound or inspirational. Most times it isn't what we want to hear. And even if what they say has nothing to do with your life we make the connections. His daughter's death makes you realize how neglected your own children are, the musician's suicide attempts makes you see how lucky you are to be poor and, abandonment cases make you thankful for those few special people in your life that are there for you even if it is only for those short two minute conversations every other day as you both head off to work..

Before you know it the voice of the story has spent the night and shared your breakfast with you. You desperately try to hold on to it because you know once it leaves it'll leave that gaping hole of a mark. You try to savor every last moment as it slips out of your hands but the tighter you cling the faster it disappears. Just like certain people in your life, they weren't meant to stay. Just leave that mark.

And oh, what a mark it leaves.

Random Pluggage of the Week: [here]

Curse of the Analytical Brain Part Two, by Zowie (:

2007-09-05T21:31:00.000+07:00

I'd like to add to Kendal's entry about the Curse of the Analytical Brain. Now, when Ms.Jess first told us that being an A1 HL Student would make it hard for us to read/watch/see something and not completely analyze it from head to toe, to be completely honest, I didn't think she was serious. That was of course, up until Kendal and I went to the mall the other day after basketball practice. Seriously, we had walked by that store SO many times, but we'd never realized it. We saw that poster and started to make all these different comments about the picture of this girl and how her flawless skin couldn't possibly have anything to do with the anti-wrinkling cream she was advertising. She was so young, and her face had no emotion to it; she seemed as if she was completely oblivious to what was happening around her, so even if she did have wrinkles, they didn't have the chance to show themselves! Aside from that was the fact that as Kendal and I were analyzing this poster we realized that not only had her skinned been tampered (computer effects) but also her eye colour had been changed! From a distance you'd just suspect that she was wearing contacts, but up close you can see the real deal, and her eye colour, was far from real. I've worn contacts, and never before have I seen a pair that were perfectly round, with one little square covering the pupil of her eye. I wonder if the model for that poster even knew that they were going to use a computer to tamper with her face, because if it was me, i surely wouldn't want that! Yeah, I'd look good on the poster, but then if someone saw me in person after seeing the poster, they probably wouldn't even recognize me!

I don't see the point in all of this false advertising. It's starting to make the world so fake. Honestly, when it comes to buying moisturisers, shampoos, conditioners, soaps, etc. I never know which ones to buy! Every single advertisement says the same thing. Basically, in my opinion, this world is just turning into a place where the process of trial and error has to take place on a day to day basis. You just have to take your pick and hope it doesn't turn out unlucky. If people are going to advertise, they should at least try to make their commercials, posters, etc. just the tiniest bit more realistic. I mean c'mon, maybe if their model had of been an elderly lady (old enough to have wrinkles), I would have believed that the anti-wrinkle cream works, but having a girl that's in her early 20's advertising for an anti-wrinkle cream... that doesn't even begin to fool me!

A Song By A Man With Nothing Better To Do..Give Him A Break, He's Searching For His Soulmate

2007-09-04T20:03:00.000+07:00

Verse

I thought you had long legs
But then I saw your shoes

An exaggerated image
That caused me to defuse

Five inch heels but what's the deal (2x)

Chorus

But it doesn't matter to me
'Cause you've got me feelin' supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
Yea, Baby, I'm feelin' supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

(Back to the top)

Hannah

2007-09-04T16:29:00.000+07:00

ok so i am sitting here reading this really great book and all of a sudden once again...BARK-BARK BARK-BARK!!... well so much for reading tonight. its been like this since we moved into our house....and of course the dumb dogs never EVER bark when it doesnt matter...its either at 3 in the morning or during family dinner or when you are trying to concentrate. its seriously ridiculous! it has gotten so bad that i cant even sleep in my own room...i have to sleep in on on the other side of the house just to get a good night sleep!! do the people at the house not hear the dogs? seriously!! and let me tell you...its not just like a couple deep barks...its like a puppy that is trapped behind something and is going to die and is yelping and yelping over and over again...but the sad thing is IT NEVER DIES!!! and i know that sounds horrible but if you woke up at 2 in the morning to little yepling ratty dogs that never quit EVER i think you would feel the same way. i cant take it anymore!!!!! i seriuously think i am going insane listening to this!!! o good they stopped. maybe i can get some....scratch that...wheres my earplugs??

Curse of the Analytical Brain

2007-09-03T20:15:00.000+07:00

So today after basketball practice, Zowie and I were walking around the mall and came across the advertisement for wrinkle creme hanging in the window of the beauty cosmetics store next to Baskin and Robbins. I'd gone by there a billion times but had never really taken much notice of it but this time, my mind must have been on full alert despite my numerous face to face encounters with the floor during basketball practice. Putting our faces up to the glass, Zowie and I went into "analytical English A1 HL student" mode. The poster advertising this creme had this young 23ish model on it with, amazingly, no wrinkles! Astonishing, I know. Tell me, what point are they trying to make when they use a model who isn't even old enough to have wrinkles?? Come on! Do they think we're stupid? Like we have NO CLUE they use technology to give the model perfect skin! Oh, and by the way, I bet if I went up and asked her, she would admit she's never even used wrinkle creme ever!
Quickly, the beverage place infront of Ace Hardware is about as quick as a snail. So why is it called 'Quickly'? Does that make any sense?
That gigantic advertisement hanging up in front of Celebrity Fitness that has the woman on it with her belly showing, that's what I call stupid advertising. Come on, that model has never actually worked out! That's a belly she's sporting, not abs, a BELLY. She's on that poster for her good looks, not because she loves fitness!
You know those advertisements that plays on the ATM machines that declare their credit card the savior of all problems? "Don't worry, darling, I brought my Lippo card!" And the credit card saves the date! Sorry to brake it to you, but saviors don't come in plastic cards.

You know what's wrong with me? It's the curse of the analytical brain.

Laura

2007-08-31T18:42:00.000+07:00

hello :)
The idea of making a blog used to sound really time consuming and boring to me. Actually, it still does but i guess when i get to blog about anything i want for english class, it beats having to write an essay or anything of that sort. When I come to think of it, blogging isn't that bad.

Guess what! After this my brother Nick is picking me up and we're going to go to sushi tei for dinner. I love sushi. If ive had a day where Ive been eating unhealthy food - for instance mie goreng for breakfast, chicken nuggets and rice for lunch - I always ask to go to a sushi restaurant for dinner. To me sushi seems so healthy and clean and light. I could eat it everyday if i had to. Japanese people are geniuses.

Speaking of Japanese people, my brother Chris is moving to Japan in January next year. Im so upset! Partly becuase im going to miss him becuase he's going to be moving even farther away from Jakarta than Vietnam and partly because I am SO jealous. I WANT TO GO TO JAPAN!!!!!!! I've actually never been to Japan before but it just seems so cool. I mean, so many cool ideas originated from Japan. Japanese people are uber smart, aren't they? Robots, handphones, heated toilet seats. wow. Im also a Naruto and Bleach geek (for people who don't know what that is, they're Japanese cartoon/comics). Before I started to get into Japanese manga and anime, i hated comics. I still do but with the exception of Naruto and Bleach. The storyline of both animes are awesome. I sound retarded. Because i grew a liking to these cartoons, Ive wanted to learn the actual Japanese language. See?? There is something good that can come out of watching cartoons! :)

Anyways. my brother's here now. He's already yelling at me to get off the computer becuase I'm always facebook-ing and chatting on msn but now i have an excuse. This is for english.

Hannah

2007-08-31T16:31:00.000+07:00

The New Kid

FINALLY i figured our how to sign into this dumb thing! why was that so hard for me to do? like seriously it was right at the top of the page...why is that? that when your looking for something so hard you can never seem to find it?? anyways.... here is my blog FINALLY...here goes...So here i sit 4 weeks into my "new kid" career. i cant believe that i have made it this far! although i miss my best friend from america like crazy (love you katie!) im really glad we came here. im not ging to lie, i really didnt want to come here at first. i wanted to stay in america where i was in my comfort zone and knew everyone. but stepping outside of that bubble and meeting new people has really turned out for the better. sure not EVERYone is nice here but i didnt expect it to be that way. it sure beats all the drama i left behind in the states. there are so many great opportunities here that i would have missed out on if i would have stayed cooped up in that little podunk town. within the 4 weeks i have already been to bali and have plans to go to australia (hopefully)...to some people that may seem stupid but if you lived where i lived and your anual vacation was shopping in Portland Oregon once a year than i think you would understand. here you just fly to singapore or bali...pshhh no big deal :) well theres my blog. hope you enjoyed :). ciao!!

Would it kill you to wait two seconds?

2007-08-30T23:22:00.000+07:00

Not my main entry, but...

Can I just say how much it annoys me when people (ahem, my family) interrupt me when I'm practicing? They don't knock but instead barge in demanding that I answer to their needs first. There I am in the middle of trying to dissect a particularly hard phrase in the music and they come in to my room completely oblivious to the fact that I was actually concentrating and trying to get it right. I ignore them and try to at least finish my thought before I forget the fingering or whatever dynamic I was supposed to write in but they persist even more to annoy me, growing more impatient with every second.

It’s that feeling of losing your train of thought in the middle of a truly stupendous idea; because when you go back, you’d have most likely forgotten the revolutionary thought.

Playing eight positions down the E string on the violin is not an easy feat and I’d appreciate it if people would be a bit more courteous and try to understand that.

Ok I'll help you with your homework and I'll do the dishes, but could you at least let me finish my scale first? There are only two notes left!

Seriously.

Love Learning, Despise School

2007-08-30T22:38:00.000+07:00

So let it be said to those who are "purist learners" (a la "football purists") - IB is most definitely not for you.

At our school the benfits of IB are heaped endlessly onto us (yes, they really do need to emphasize that your prospective university will take IB credits twenty million times) and apparently they feel the need to enforce it upon everyone who attends this school. Very much like the Asian (Chinese?) stereotype to mold every student into perfect overachievers, isn't it?

The IB Diploma Programme is an internationally accepted university prep program. The DP prepares you for university, but what else does it do? You learn how to analyze a political cartoon in the most textbook way possible, your biology classes are spent making sure the mitochondria and Golgi bodies on your cell sketch is exactly as you see it in the photographs, your essays are filled to the brim with SAT words and constructed in a way that would make a computer proud and after two years you are essentially a walking, talking encyclopedia. That's not a bad thing and it certainly gives you that preparation for university life that's mainly academia, but there is such a thing as learning for the sake of knowing. In IB you work towards exams, grades mean everything and creative ranges are diminished in favor of more practical work. Opinions can be wrong and classes are chosen in accordance to your 10 year plan. Besides, who would take a course just because it seems interesting?

IB teaches you do well in school. It teaches you to do well in university. It teaches you to excell in a class environment where everything seems black and white. You grow knowledgeable about IB things (or so says Johanna and Alice).

Not even all facts are black and white. Nonetheless, there are so many things you can do with them. Knowledge should not be something that is so clearly defined when the world is full of information that is controversial and ambiguous. How then can it be categorized as something that is absolute?

The grades of IB are sometimes ridiculous. Can one's acquisition of knowledge and information really be ranked? It would be immensely difficult, to say the least, for an accurate report of progress to be made on each individual student with the current teacher-student ration that exists without the use of the current grading system. It is international, after all. How else can you effectively measure the success of getting "stuff" into a child's mind?

But really, are exams worth 80% of your grade really necessary?

Apparently the IBO felt it was important to stress the fact that IB isn't all about exams: (video)

Seems to me like a one-size-fits-all program for a people wearing sizes 0-30.

Zoe (:

2007-08-29T19:10:00.000+07:00

Well, I was supposed to post a blog yesterday, but my internet wasn't working, so I'm going to post one now. I'm not really used to this whole blogging thing, so I'm not really sure what to write. I was just viewing my Friendster and then my Facebook and so, although it's random, I want to talk about the whole debate about Facebook being better than Friendster. I've had Friendster for about 2 years, and then just recently Facebook comes along and everyone ditches Friendster and goes to Facebook. I mean c'mon.. Maybe Facebook has a lot more applications, but I think it's just too much. Okay, so Friendster's getting a little old, and there isn't so much to do on there but I personally think simple is better (especially when we have IB homework to do). On Facebook I always get these random emails saying "so and so has just bit you" and "so and so wants to fight you" I mean.. okay, i guess it's not reality but still, there's always so much going on; I can barely keep up. I have about 20 requests for all these applications; I've gotten to the point where I don't even bother to read what they'e about, I just accept them and then leave it for a few days. Yes, it's interesting, and I'll admit, it's very addictive, but that just makes it even harder! Here I am trying to do my IB HOMEWORK and then a little message pops up saying "You have just received an email from Facebook" and so what do I do.. I go right ahead and check it. And instead of spending only a few minutes checking it, I end up spending an hour on it; it completely draws me in. Anyway, that's my blog about Friendster and Facebook. I like Facebook, don't get me wrong, I just hate the fact that it's so addictive (so much more addictive than Friendster; completely due to all of those extra applications that Friendster doesn't offer) that I end up spending far too much time on it. I think I should just stick to Friendster from now on because I can never spend more than half an hour on there. Although I'm saying this I know that I'll end up checking Facebook any minute now.. arghh.. *hopeless*. Anyway people, leave comments.. Do you think Facebook is better than Friendster? Friendster is better than Facebook? Facebook is too addictive? Or the IB Diploma Program just gives us far too much homework and therefore it's not Facebook's fault that we never get our homework done? :) I like the last option.. Who agrees? ;)

Zoe, Hannah, Laura, Phoebe (We're filling in for Kendal, she's in America)

2007-08-28T13:45:00.000+07:00

Hey everyone :) This is our new blog! We're still new to the whole blog writing thing, so at first we might not be very interesting but don't worry, over time, we'll try to entertain you! We're still waiting on Kendal to get back from the States so that our group will be complete.. Seeya!

Posting Schedule:
Monday - Kendal
Tuesday - Hannah
Wednesday - Zoe
Thursday - Phoebe
Friday - Laura