[Edit: Since they're all thoughts, I figured I could combine them on one blog. Obviously, they don't all really connect with each other. Or at least, not enough to create a "real" entry.]

[10/6/07]
The problem with dreamers is they usually can't stop dreaming long enough to act on the brilliant imaginations in their mind. They plan and imagine great things for the future, but the roller coast ride comes to a deadening halt when reality sets in.
As an "ex-perfectionist/overachiever," I know what it means to aim big and live by high standards. Failure is not an option, which is why you don't even consider what would happen "if I don't make it." I don't know what happened - maybe it was the move to a cliche private school in Southeast Asia where the majority of the students seem to perfectly fit the Asian stereotype mold - but I grew out of my perfectionist ways. More so, I began to mock them. Mock what I used to be (or tried to be, anyways). Perhaps, it was my loss of inspiration and passion, but I didn't see the point anymore. Nevertheless, I know you have to be determined and ambitious and set yourself seemingly impossible goals.

The other part of me is the dreamer. In that aspect, I often get caught up in my make-believe world and forget that hard work isn't given free with the overachiever package. In this case, the goals set are more elusive and a bit exaggerated.

They go together quite well, actually. You have to be a dreamer to think big and a sort of overachiever to make those dreams reality. The most important part you have to remember is to keep the balance though. If you dream too big for yourself, you're usually blinded by the prospect of that dream to think rationally enough to realize that you're hurting yourself more if you go through with it.
Unfortunately, the greater the dream, the harder the fall. The worst part is the disappointment. Somewhere, in the bowels of your consciousness you knew that you probably would not have succeeded anyway, but those thoughts are drowned out by the shouts of chaos of your imagination. So, in response to those shouts you decide to go for it. And where in any other situation that would be considered a positive attitude it is not so for this.


[10/3/07]
I already had my opinions on such topics like abortion, homosexuality, euthanasia, cloning, and stem cell research before I had truly become a Christian. In fact, they were quite liberal.

Now, that I know exactly where I am spiritually and my position in God is more clearly defined to me I have accepted what the Bible teaches and what the church preaches on such topics like those. Honestly, both sides have their points. There must be a reason people hold on so dearly to their beliefs when dealing with these issues.

Does that mean that I'm simply accepting teachings that I might not necessarily believe in so I can 'be a Christian'? Doesn't that mean I'm lying to myself? Or am I now turning the blind eye to topics that might arouse personal opinions contradictory to the church so I won't compromise my position as a Christian?

Not a comforting notion but maybe my sense of morality was distorted to begin with...

Labels: Christianity, controversy, dreams, failure, liberalism, morality, overachievers