Blog postings up to December 10, 2007.
[8/30] Love Learning, Despise School
[9/6] 'Jersey Boys' Response
[9/10] Attention All Languid Scholars
[9/22] Assessment of Art
[9/29] Why I Do It
[10/4] Stream of Consciousness (Blurbs)
[10/27] Alone
[11/3] In the Life of...
[11/14] Dear Mother
[12/4] Looking In
2 new ones:
[12/10] Off-Color Obsession
[12/11] No, Thank You: An Intro
posted by Pb, lead at 10:10 PM
Monday, December 10, 2007
I have never attended a private school before this and I've always had quite negative inclinations towards them, their students, and their administrations. By the time I was in 4th grade many of my friends had begun to transfer into private schools, mostly to all-girls/boys schools (those few that I knew that attended Catholic schools had moved at around 2nd or 3rd grade). Nothing would change in terms of our usual gatherings and outings but naturally we said our goodbyes. We feared for the worst: that they would become one of them.
It's not that we were unreasonably poor - I'm sure most of us in our group had parents that could afford to send their kids to private schools - certainly though, our parents had very different views on education. The wealth of some of my friends was also not so easily distinguished. It was hidden not among luxurious and excessive displays of material possessions such as jewelry as much as it was shown in their houses. They weren't big mansions but they were historical landmarks. Virginia as a whole often fails to attract many tourists because of its lack of "exciting" attractions. What we have are centuries of American history perserved within our seemingly dark and distant forests. We're over our heads in history that I sometimes think people have already forgotten about us ("Oh, well, at least we know that we won't ever get attacked by terrorists!" from a friend).
Nonetheless, I didn't think much of those "private school girls." In terms of education and intelligence they certainly did not amount to much. They were shallow and had such a negative assertiveness to their whole persona. They had so much confidence in everything that came out of their mouths regardless of what nonsense they spewed out. They lived lavishly in hopes that the spotlight would forever be on them. Unfortunately, a lot of my friends became these girls. My relationships with them grew to be quite interesting. I had my closer friends with whom I would mock and make fun of the prissies but I was not at all mean to them. Whenever we got together it just seemed like a big joke. Naturally, I did not think as highly of them. They had too many secrets around them, it was the grandest scale of hypocricies.
People here are often quite surprised to know that I had gone to a public school in the states. My middle school especially was predominantly African-American. Sure, there was trouble but in many ways I think my head was straighter there than it is here. I guess you can say I have yet to master the art of juggling my deceptions.
Sometimes I wonder who's pitying who...
It's not that we were unreasonably poor - I'm sure most of us in our group had parents that could afford to send their kids to private schools - certainly though, our parents had very different views on education. The wealth of some of my friends was also not so easily distinguished. It was hidden not among luxurious and excessive displays of material possessions such as jewelry as much as it was shown in their houses. They weren't big mansions but they were historical landmarks. Virginia as a whole often fails to attract many tourists because of its lack of "exciting" attractions. What we have are centuries of American history perserved within our seemingly dark and distant forests. We're over our heads in history that I sometimes think people have already forgotten about us ("Oh, well, at least we know that we won't ever get attacked by terrorists!" from a friend).
Nonetheless, I didn't think much of those "private school girls." In terms of education and intelligence they certainly did not amount to much. They were shallow and had such a negative assertiveness to their whole persona. They had so much confidence in everything that came out of their mouths regardless of what nonsense they spewed out. They lived lavishly in hopes that the spotlight would forever be on them. Unfortunately, a lot of my friends became these girls. My relationships with them grew to be quite interesting. I had my closer friends with whom I would mock and make fun of the prissies but I was not at all mean to them. Whenever we got together it just seemed like a big joke. Naturally, I did not think as highly of them. They had too many secrets around them, it was the grandest scale of hypocricies.
People here are often quite surprised to know that I had gone to a public school in the states. My middle school especially was predominantly African-American. Sure, there was trouble but in many ways I think my head was straighter there than it is here. I guess you can say I have yet to master the art of juggling my deceptions.
Sometimes I wonder who's pitying who...
I remember around the time I was in 7th grade I developed an obsession with suicide. Death, in general, had intrigued me but I had stumbled upon a few fictional novels surrounding the issue of teenage suicide and it drew me in. I was not at all suicidal or even depressed, in fact, at that time, I was pretty content with my life and who I was - something I was not accustomed to up to this point. There was something obscure and alluring about the very thought. Some melancholy beauty that seemed majestic yet terrifying at the same time. It scared me, but I just couldn't take myself out of the darkness. Much like Annie John actually, with her slight obsession with death.
I did my own research of course, and read real stories about teen suicide. It amazed me how altogether complex these adolescent minds must be! (Or maybe by choosing 'the easy way out' their minds became blurred to form one continuous strand that was not at all complicated). People called it cowardice that these victims would take their own life - a decision not meant for imperfect, unenlightened, human minds - but surely you must have some ounce of courage within you to dare stop the wheels of your existence.
I couldn't understand the depths to which they felt their loss, their grief. Was it truly possible for one to be so overcome with worthlessness and sorrow that they would even consider to end it by simply disappearing? 'How stupid,' I thought. I mean, the least you could do was runaway first. Do something extravagant before you kill yourself. You were going to die anyway.
The following year, I was in 8th grade and word got around about a suicide that happened at a middle school outside of the city. Apparently, it had been one of my close friend's acquaintances. I would expect this shook some of us quite a bit. Suicides weren't uncommon, but I would expect that Richmond doesn't have a high suicide rate. Most troubled teens move on to the Carolinas and proceed to commit more moral self-destruction there before they would even consider physical harm to themselves. I did not watch the special on the local news about the event, but from my friends, I had gathered that she killed herself because of a bad breakup with a boyfriend and her subsequent 'D' on a test shortly following. I pitied her so much. 'What a lost soul.' Imagine killing yourself over a test grade.
Now, that I am reminded of it again, I am reconsidering my stance on her death. Sure, there are the really idiotic ones who commit suicide for attention, but I don't find it impossible that things as small as a break-up and a fail could push someone over the edge. If you have multitudes of pressure mounting on you, a little blow could soon be destructive and cause a mental implosion. I can certainly relate to that. To have something so overbearing always on your shoulder. There are no time-outs. There seems to be no escape because what you thought was your asylum has disappeared, and in its place is now another monster. Saying it aloud - what she must have been feeling - would only degrade its importance. How could you express something like that in something as concrete and restricting as words?
The news of that girl swept over us like another breeze. After the day it came up on the news, no one else mentioned the story; none of us had really cared in the first place. Besides, there were sniper alerts and school shootings taking place closer to home. At the same time I, too, had realized that my obsession was slowly fading. I was not completely free of it, but I just no longer had the time to sit around and mull around in my thoughts.
It no longer haunts me - the idea of suicide, I mean. It's tragic, but I'm not afraid of it like I was back in middle school. Not that I'm any closer to understanding how they could possibly bring themselves to it, but I must admit I stand aghast at my own discoveries thus far. The thing is though, I understand clearer now what it must be like for them. Whereas, I had been from the outside trying to look into a hazy window, I am now standing on the inside realizing that it had been a one-way mirror all along.
Sunday, December 9, 2007
I reallyyy have no clue what to write right now. It is Sunday night and there is one week left of school so I am not really in the school mode. I am just ready to sleep in and take it easy for 3 weeks. WOOHOO! My grandparents are coming on Tuesday and so I am really excited! I just need to get through this last week!! Usually the last week before break is fun... and maybe the last few days will be but i know for sure that these first few days SUCK! Tomorrow I have my IOP to do and lets just say I am super nervous for it!!! Plus I have this weird bahasa homework due tomorrow and I am not even sure what I am supposed to do for it. Then on Tuesday i have a stupid math test plus I think i have my first volley ball game of the season... which I am not looking super forward to because I am not that good at volley ball. I think one of the main reasons that I don't improve that much in volley ball is because i can't understand what she is saying. She speaks in Indonesian the whole time and i catch just a few words that she says. These are the times that I wish I lived back in America! Haha. Friday night was the deeper concert, and it was actually really fun. The band is really good. The only weird thing was that everyone jumped. Haha I don't know why but when it is christian songs I don't feel like jumping as much as usual. I think my favorite part was when there was the candle lighting and stuff. It was really relaxing and christmas-y.. haha. Today was Zowie's birthday party. It was fun! We went to the Mariot for lunch and has some amazing food! Then we waved and hitted on random guys on the toll road... that was probably the best part! Especially when we tried to through our number at some guy... bwahahaha! Then we went and played pool at Piza. All in all it was a fun day. Boy I really dont want to go back to school tomorrow!! I just have to keep the word HOLIDAY running through my head and I think I will be ok. Well it is kinda late..actually its not but I am tired. Sorry this is a really random post!! My brain couldn't think of anything to write... I think IB has turned it into mush. GUH.
~Hana
~Hana
Saturday, December 8, 2007
christmas is definitly my favourite holiday of the year. i loooooooooove it. i dont know what it is about it that makes me so festive every year, but nevertheless, i do become surprisingly festive. i find it really sad to see people not excited during the christmas season. christmas is always so pretty and exciting i dont know how its possible not to be excited. maybe the fact that i dont have to go to school for three weeks and ill be receiving presents is a big factor as to why i get so excited about this holiday. i guess the only thing i dont like about christmas is having to figure out what presents to buy my family. what if they dont like what i get them? what if someone else gets them the same thing? its just so irritating having to think about all that. i wish i could just read people's minds and buy them what they really want so they wont have to pretend to like the presents i get them if they find it to be average.
do you guys know the song Santa Baby by Eartha Kitt? ive never been so in love with a christmas song until my dad played it on his strereo the other night. yes i know that this is a relatively old song, but its not my fault that i havent heard of it before =). the song's so cute and funny and unique, i never get bored listening to it. i usually dont put the lyrics of songs in my blogs but this song needs to be put in my blog. its too good. (i wont put the whole song down; just little parts of it.)
Santa Baby -Eartha Kitt
Santa baby, slip a sable under the tree, For me.
been an awful good girl,
Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight.
Think of all the fun I've missed,
Think of all the fellas that I haven't kissed,
Next year I could be just as good,
If you'll check off my Christmas list,
Santa cutie, and fill my stocking with a duplex, And checks.
Sign your 'X' on the line,
Santa cutie, and hurry down the chimney tonight.
Come and trim my Christmas tree,
With some decorations bought at Tiffany's,
I really do believe in you,
Let's see if you believe in me,
Santa baby, forgot to mention one little thing, A ring.
I don't mean on the phone,
Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight,
Hurry down the chimney tonight,
Hurry, tonight.
ISNT IT CUTE?!?!?! i highly recommend anyone who hasnt heard of this song to downlowad it right away. i know it may seem a little weird in the beginning since its not very often we hear someone sing about santa that way, but after a while, it really starts to get to you. its addicting and im a MAJOR addict.
------------------------------------------------------------------
here are some christmas jokes:
How come you never hear anything about the 10th reindeer "Olive" ?
Olive ?
Yeah, you know, "Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names"
HAHA!
What did Adam say on the day before Christmas ?
It's Christmas, Eve !
HAHA!
What do elves learn in school?
The ELF-abet
HAHA!
Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?
You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.
HAHA!
(the funnier jokes were kind of off color so i decided it wasnt a good idea to share them) :)
well, i hope all you guys have a lovely christmas and a happy new year. may your parents/siblings/boyfriend(s)/friends give u what you acutally want
BUTTERFLY KISSES
BY~ BOB CARLISLE
There's two things I know for sure.
She was sent here from heaven,
And she's daddy's little girl.
As I drop to my knees by her bed at night,
she talks to Jesus, and I close my eyes.
And I thank God for all of the joy in my life, But most of all, for...
Butterfly kisses after bedtime prayer.
Stickin' little white flowers all up in her hair.
"Walk beside the pony daddy, it's my first ride."
"I know the cake looks funny daddy, but I sure tried."
Oh, with all that I've done wrong,
I must have done something right
To deserve a hug every morning,
And butterfly kisses at night.
Sweet Sixten today,
She's looking like her momma
a little more everyday.
One part women, the other part girl.
To perfume and makeup,
from ribbons and curls.
Trying her wings out in a great big world. But I remember...
Butterfly kisses after bedtime prayer.
Stickin' little white flowers all up in her hair.
"You know how much I love you daddy,
But if you dont mind,
I'm only going to kiss you on
the cheek this time."
With all that I've done wrong,
I must have done have something right.
To deserve her love every morning,
And butterfly kisses at night.
All the precious time
Like the wind, the years go by
Precious butterfly
Spread you wings and fly
She'll change her name today.
She'll make a promise,
and I'll give her away.
Standing in the bride room
just staring at her,
she asked me what I'm thinking,
and I said "I'm not sure,
I just feel like I'm losing my baby girl."
Then she leaned over...and gave me...
Butterfly kisses, with her momma there
Sticking little white flowers all up in her hair
"Walk me down the aisle daddy, it's just about time"
"Does my wedding gown look pretty daddy?" "Daddy don't cry"
With all that I've done wrong, I must have done something right
To deserve her love every morning,
And butterfly kisses
I couldn't ask God for more, man, this is what love is
I know I gotta let her go, but I'll always remember
Every hug in the morning, and butterfly kisses..
THIS SONG STARTED PLAYING ON MY IPOD AS I WAS WORKING OUT THIS MORNING. I HADN'T LISTENED TO IT FOR QUITE SOME TIME AND IT MADE ME STOP AND THINK A LITTLE. ALL OF A SUDDEN IT FEELS LIKE MY LIFE IS GOING SO FAST THAT I CAN'T CATCH UP WITH IT. EVERY TIME I TURN AROUND I HAVE A WHOLE DIFFERENT SET OF EMOTIONS FLOODING THROUGH ME. ONE MINUTE I FEEL HAPPY AND EXCITED ABOUT LIFE, AND THE NEXT MINUTE I JUST WANT TO STAY IN BED AND NEVER SEE ANYONE EVER AGAIN. I REALIZE THAT IT IS THE AGE THAT IM AT AND I HAVE TONS OF "CHANGES" HAPPENING IN ME RIGHT NOW OR AT LEAST THAT IS WHAT MY MOM KEEPS TRYING TO TELL ME. I KNOW THAT THOSE THINGS ARE ALL TRUE BUT THIS SONG BRINGS ME BACK TO WHEN I WAS YOUNGER. LIFE WAS SO SIMPLE AND FUN. YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO WORRIE ABOUT GRADES OR GUYS OR EATING HEALTHY OR ANYTHING. I MISS THE DAYS WHEN LIFE WAS CARE FREE. WHEN NO ONE CARED ABOUT ANYTHING BUT WHAT RECESS GAME TO PLAY NEXT. RIGHT NOW ITS LIKE MY BRAIN IS ON OVER DRIVE AND MY EMOTIONS ARE ON THOSE SPINNING STRAWBERRY RIDES AT CARNIVALS. AND THEN SINCE THE SPINNING OVER DRIVE IS TAKING PLACE MY BODY CAN'T KEEP UP AND EVENTUALLY I JUST FALL INTO A HEAP. EVERYTHING SEEMS SO UNCERTAIN AND UNSTABLE RIGHT NOW. LIKE ANY SECOND EVERYTHING COULD BE FLIPPED... AND IM NOT SURE IT THE FLIP SIDE WOULD BE BETTER OR WORSE TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH, BECAUSE IM NOT SURE IF WHERE I AM AT IS GOOD OR BAD. GEEZE, I THINK OF THIS SONG AND IT TALKES ABOUT A DAD LOVING HIS DAUGHTER AND HOW SHE GROWS UP. AND I CAN'T HELP BUT THINK "I DON'T WANNA GROW UP!" HAHAHA BECOMING OLDER USED TO SOUND FUN AND EXCITING TO ME, BUT NOW I JUST FEEL LIKE IM IN A WHIRL WIND AND IM NOT READY TO BE ON MY OWN OR COMPLETELY GROWN UP. THE THING IS THOUGH, THAT WETHER I, READY OR NOT ITS STILL GOING TO HAPPEN... AND ITS GOING TO HAPPEN SOONER RATHER THEN LATER.
WE WILL ALL MAKE IT ONE WAY OR ANOTHER!
~Hana
BY~ BOB CARLISLE
There's two things I know for sure.
She was sent here from heaven,
And she's daddy's little girl.
As I drop to my knees by her bed at night,
she talks to Jesus, and I close my eyes.
And I thank God for all of the joy in my life, But most of all, for...
Butterfly kisses after bedtime prayer.
Stickin' little white flowers all up in her hair.
"Walk beside the pony daddy, it's my first ride."
"I know the cake looks funny daddy, but I sure tried."
Oh, with all that I've done wrong,
I must have done something right
To deserve a hug every morning,
And butterfly kisses at night.
Sweet Sixten today,
She's looking like her momma
a little more everyday.
One part women, the other part girl.
To perfume and makeup,
from ribbons and curls.
Trying her wings out in a great big world. But I remember...
Butterfly kisses after bedtime prayer.
Stickin' little white flowers all up in her hair.
"You know how much I love you daddy,
But if you dont mind,
I'm only going to kiss you on
the cheek this time."
With all that I've done wrong,
I must have done have something right.
To deserve her love every morning,
And butterfly kisses at night.
All the precious time
Like the wind, the years go by
Precious butterfly
Spread you wings and fly
She'll change her name today.
She'll make a promise,
and I'll give her away.
Standing in the bride room
just staring at her,
she asked me what I'm thinking,
and I said "I'm not sure,
I just feel like I'm losing my baby girl."
Then she leaned over...and gave me...
Butterfly kisses, with her momma there
Sticking little white flowers all up in her hair
"Walk me down the aisle daddy, it's just about time"
"Does my wedding gown look pretty daddy?" "Daddy don't cry"
With all that I've done wrong, I must have done something right
To deserve her love every morning,
And butterfly kisses
I couldn't ask God for more, man, this is what love is
I know I gotta let her go, but I'll always remember
Every hug in the morning, and butterfly kisses..
THIS SONG STARTED PLAYING ON MY IPOD AS I WAS WORKING OUT THIS MORNING. I HADN'T LISTENED TO IT FOR QUITE SOME TIME AND IT MADE ME STOP AND THINK A LITTLE. ALL OF A SUDDEN IT FEELS LIKE MY LIFE IS GOING SO FAST THAT I CAN'T CATCH UP WITH IT. EVERY TIME I TURN AROUND I HAVE A WHOLE DIFFERENT SET OF EMOTIONS FLOODING THROUGH ME. ONE MINUTE I FEEL HAPPY AND EXCITED ABOUT LIFE, AND THE NEXT MINUTE I JUST WANT TO STAY IN BED AND NEVER SEE ANYONE EVER AGAIN. I REALIZE THAT IT IS THE AGE THAT IM AT AND I HAVE TONS OF "CHANGES" HAPPENING IN ME RIGHT NOW OR AT LEAST THAT IS WHAT MY MOM KEEPS TRYING TO TELL ME. I KNOW THAT THOSE THINGS ARE ALL TRUE BUT THIS SONG BRINGS ME BACK TO WHEN I WAS YOUNGER. LIFE WAS SO SIMPLE AND FUN. YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO WORRIE ABOUT GRADES OR GUYS OR EATING HEALTHY OR ANYTHING. I MISS THE DAYS WHEN LIFE WAS CARE FREE. WHEN NO ONE CARED ABOUT ANYTHING BUT WHAT RECESS GAME TO PLAY NEXT. RIGHT NOW ITS LIKE MY BRAIN IS ON OVER DRIVE AND MY EMOTIONS ARE ON THOSE SPINNING STRAWBERRY RIDES AT CARNIVALS. AND THEN SINCE THE SPINNING OVER DRIVE IS TAKING PLACE MY BODY CAN'T KEEP UP AND EVENTUALLY I JUST FALL INTO A HEAP. EVERYTHING SEEMS SO UNCERTAIN AND UNSTABLE RIGHT NOW. LIKE ANY SECOND EVERYTHING COULD BE FLIPPED... AND IM NOT SURE IT THE FLIP SIDE WOULD BE BETTER OR WORSE TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH, BECAUSE IM NOT SURE IF WHERE I AM AT IS GOOD OR BAD. GEEZE, I THINK OF THIS SONG AND IT TALKES ABOUT A DAD LOVING HIS DAUGHTER AND HOW SHE GROWS UP. AND I CAN'T HELP BUT THINK "I DON'T WANNA GROW UP!" HAHAHA BECOMING OLDER USED TO SOUND FUN AND EXCITING TO ME, BUT NOW I JUST FEEL LIKE IM IN A WHIRL WIND AND IM NOT READY TO BE ON MY OWN OR COMPLETELY GROWN UP. THE THING IS THOUGH, THAT WETHER I, READY OR NOT ITS STILL GOING TO HAPPEN... AND ITS GOING TO HAPPEN SOONER RATHER THEN LATER.
WE WILL ALL MAKE IT ONE WAY OR ANOTHER!
~Hana
Friday, December 7, 2007
SOMETIMES I WISH THAT WE JUST DIDNT FEEL AT ALL...
...SOMETIMES YOUR HEART CAN BE WRONG...
...I DONT UNDERSTAND OUR HEART AT ALL...
...PEOPLE SAY TO FOLLOW YOUR HEART...
...BUT WHAT IF YOUR HEART IS WRONG...
...WHY DO WE SOMETIMES FEEL SOMETHING THATS NOT MEANT TO BE...
...AND HOW DO WE TELL OUR HEART FROM OUR HEAD...
...SOMETIMES WE GET HAPPY OR EXCITED BECAUSE OF WHAT WE THINK OUR HEART IS SAYING...
...MAYBE WE GET ANXIOUS OR DREAM TOO SOON...
...THEN QUICKLY WE REALIZE THAT IT COULD NEVER BE...
...AND OUR HEART HURTS...AGAIN...
...IT SEEMS LIKE IT NEVER STOPS...
...THE GLANCES...
...THE SMILES...
...THE BUTTERFLIES...
...THE MOMENTS...
...THAT QUICKLY FADE TO NOTHINGNESS...
...THAT SEEM TO BE ALL MISUNDERSTOOD...
...THEN OUR HEAD TELLS US THAT WE ARENT GOOD ENOUGH, PRETTY ENOUGH, SMART ENOUGH...
...AND THAT SEEMS TO BE THE ONLY THING THAT ENDS UP RIGHT...
~Hana
...SOMETIMES YOUR HEART CAN BE WRONG...
...I DONT UNDERSTAND OUR HEART AT ALL...
...PEOPLE SAY TO FOLLOW YOUR HEART...
...BUT WHAT IF YOUR HEART IS WRONG...
...WHY DO WE SOMETIMES FEEL SOMETHING THATS NOT MEANT TO BE...
...AND HOW DO WE TELL OUR HEART FROM OUR HEAD...
...SOMETIMES WE GET HAPPY OR EXCITED BECAUSE OF WHAT WE THINK OUR HEART IS SAYING...
...MAYBE WE GET ANXIOUS OR DREAM TOO SOON...
...THEN QUICKLY WE REALIZE THAT IT COULD NEVER BE...
...AND OUR HEART HURTS...AGAIN...
...IT SEEMS LIKE IT NEVER STOPS...
...THE GLANCES...
...THE SMILES...
...THE BUTTERFLIES...
...THE MOMENTS...
...THAT QUICKLY FADE TO NOTHINGNESS...
...THAT SEEM TO BE ALL MISUNDERSTOOD...
...THEN OUR HEAD TELLS US THAT WE ARENT GOOD ENOUGH, PRETTY ENOUGH, SMART ENOUGH...
...AND THAT SEEMS TO BE THE ONLY THING THAT ENDS UP RIGHT...
~Hana
i hate public speaking. i don't know what it is about me but i just cant seem to gather up the courage to have the ability to sound remotely intelligent when i have to stand up in front of a group of people and present something. its really annoying. i suppose what really gets my nerves going is the thought of getting up there and having my voice shake when I'm in the middle of talking. do you know how embarrassing it is to have everyone know how nervous you are when you're in the middle of presenting? you just feel like digging yourself a hole in the ground and hiding in it. i tried everything to get rid of this fear of public speaking, including trying to imagine everyone naked. it doesn't work. the one and only time i tried this method was during my 7th grade BI presentation. all it did for me was make myself appear even stupider. the thought of everyone naked did indeed make me laugh, but it wasn't the kind that took away the anxiousness, but the kind that added to it. i don't know how, but it still managed to make me feel horrible. this fear started off as something little that i thought would eventually go away, but instead it had this snowball effect on me. the more presentations i had to do, the more nervouse i'd get. it came to the point where even i thought it was ridiculous how nervous i became. it was just a presentation! then, i finally figured it out the secret.
its amazing how much your mind is in control of your emotions. i figured out that all i had to do was make myself beleive that the presentation wasnt a big deal and POOF i wasnt nervous anymore =D amazing. sadly i get easily influenced by the emotions of other people so if i see another classmate of mine spazing out about their presentation, ill freak out too. in short, i am still afraid of public speaking but as long as i keep myself calm, ill be able to prevent myself from looking dumb in front of the class and ill be alright. so if anyone out there has the same problem i do, take my advice and just try to convince yourself that giving a presentation is nothing. good luck!
its amazing how much your mind is in control of your emotions. i figured out that all i had to do was make myself beleive that the presentation wasnt a big deal and POOF i wasnt nervous anymore =D amazing. sadly i get easily influenced by the emotions of other people so if i see another classmate of mine spazing out about their presentation, ill freak out too. in short, i am still afraid of public speaking but as long as i keep myself calm, ill be able to prevent myself from looking dumb in front of the class and ill be alright. so if anyone out there has the same problem i do, take my advice and just try to convince yourself that giving a presentation is nothing. good luck!
Thursday, December 6, 2007
December is the Christmas Season, but it's also the month in which my birthday takes place. In a way, i guess it's a good thing because there are a lot of people in the Christmas mood.. meaning they're in a giving mood :P but then again, it can also be a really bad thing. Sometimes people get so caught up in the Christmas season that they forget everything else that's going on. I'm not saying that my birthday is a big deal, it's nowhere near as important as Christmas, but yeah.. i don't know. Anyway, aside from my birthday falling in the same month as Christmas, I actually really enjoy the Christmas season! Everyone is in a good mood, everyone is in a giving mood, it brings families and friends together, the weather is usually good (in Aus), and school tends to be a little more laid back - meaning there are more fun activities that we all are able to enjoy.
This Christmas will be the first Christmas I've had without my grandfather. Every year for pretty much my whole life, my dads side of the family would meet at my grandfathers house and we'd all enjoy an awesome lunch along with some old family stories. Maybe it doesn't seem like fun but actually, it was because this was one of the only times i got to see my grandfather - unless we were visiting him in hospital - because he lived so far away from us. Also, being in Indonesia for the past 2 and a half years doesn't help either, because for the last 2 years of his life we barely saw him, and we couldn't really speak to him on the phone because about 4 years ago he had cancer on his voice box, meaning it had to be removed; making it kind of hard to understand him. This year, I'll be spending Christmas with my Aunty and her family. I'm not saying that's a bad thing, because it's not! I'll get to spend time with my cousins, we can go in the swimming pool, hang out, go to the beach, or just sit in the lounge room and watch movies. I'm just saying that it would be nice if my grandfather could join us again, just like he did last Christmas.
This Christmas will be the first Christmas I've had without my grandfather. Every year for pretty much my whole life, my dads side of the family would meet at my grandfathers house and we'd all enjoy an awesome lunch along with some old family stories. Maybe it doesn't seem like fun but actually, it was because this was one of the only times i got to see my grandfather - unless we were visiting him in hospital - because he lived so far away from us. Also, being in Indonesia for the past 2 and a half years doesn't help either, because for the last 2 years of his life we barely saw him, and we couldn't really speak to him on the phone because about 4 years ago he had cancer on his voice box, meaning it had to be removed; making it kind of hard to understand him. This year, I'll be spending Christmas with my Aunty and her family. I'm not saying that's a bad thing, because it's not! I'll get to spend time with my cousins, we can go in the swimming pool, hang out, go to the beach, or just sit in the lounge room and watch movies. I'm just saying that it would be nice if my grandfather could join us again, just like he did last Christmas.
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
Linking to my last post, following my last exam I went to the movies with YouJin to watch Enchanted. I wasn't sure what to expect, because i hadn't seen the previews or heard much about it aside from what some people in school had said about it. The movie started at 9:10pm, we were a little late, but we still got to watch majority of it. In the beginning it seemed kind of cheezy, but then as the movie progresses you kind of start to get into it. McDreamy (Patrick Dempsey) is so adorable. I know he's kind of old and all, but his eyes *sigh*, they aren't far from perfect, not far at all! While watching this movie you begin to get into the mindset that fairytales do come true; well, i did anyway. You just can't help yourself. Fairytales are made up stories of happily ever afters that are never actually seen in real life, but only in storybooks. Still, everyone - at least once in a lifetime - wishes for a fairytale, but then finds themselves disappointed because what they once thought so real, turns out to be the total opposite: a complete lie. But then again, peoples perceptions of fairytales could vary, right? And therefore, maybe some peoples fairytales do come true, and they do end up getting their 'happily ever after' after all.
Not only does the storyline, and that fine slither of hope really get to you when you watch this movie, but it's also the music that helps to have a greater impact on the audience. I actually watched Enchanted again the on the Saturday following the Wednesday of exams. I still remember the way that Hannah, Kendal and I sat in awe when McDreamy was dancing with Giselle at the ball. It wasn't necessarily the way that they danced, or even the way McDreamy looked at her (although it was pretty sweet), it was more the music that played while they danced, and the meaning of the lyrics that made the setting that-much-more perfect!
The song is called:
'So Close' by Jon McLauglin.
You’re in my arms
And all the world is calm
The music playing on for only two
So close together
And when I’m with you
So close to feeling alive
A life goes by
Romantic dreams will stop
So I bid mine goodbye and never knew
So close was waiting, waiting here with you
And now forever I know
All that I wanted to hold you
So close
So close to reaching that famous happy end
Almost believing this was not pretend
And now you’re beside me and look how far we’ve come
So far we are so close
How could I face the faceless days
If I should lose you now?
We’re so close
To reaching that famous happy end
And almost believing this was not pretend
Let’s go on dreaming for we know we are
So close
So close
And still so far
I've been addicted to this song ever since I heard it, I downloaded it, and I play it on repeat. I love it! Im not sure about the guys (because im not a guy) but being a girl, hearing that song, at that particular moment, makes it stand out so much more. It makes you listen to the lyrics and take in every last word of what he says, because it is those words that makes the moment oh-so-perfect, and absolutely priceless!
Not only does the storyline, and that fine slither of hope really get to you when you watch this movie, but it's also the music that helps to have a greater impact on the audience. I actually watched Enchanted again the on the Saturday following the Wednesday of exams. I still remember the way that Hannah, Kendal and I sat in awe when McDreamy was dancing with Giselle at the ball. It wasn't necessarily the way that they danced, or even the way McDreamy looked at her (although it was pretty sweet), it was more the music that played while they danced, and the meaning of the lyrics that made the setting that-much-more perfect!
The song is called:
'So Close' by Jon McLauglin.
You’re in my arms
And all the world is calm
The music playing on for only two
So close together
And when I’m with you
So close to feeling alive
A life goes by
Romantic dreams will stop
So I bid mine goodbye and never knew
So close was waiting, waiting here with you
And now forever I know
All that I wanted to hold you
So close
So close to reaching that famous happy end
Almost believing this was not pretend
And now you’re beside me and look how far we’ve come
So far we are so close
How could I face the faceless days
If I should lose you now?
We’re so close
To reaching that famous happy end
And almost believing this was not pretend
Let’s go on dreaming for we know we are
So close
So close
And still so far
I've been addicted to this song ever since I heard it, I downloaded it, and I play it on repeat. I love it! Im not sure about the guys (because im not a guy) but being a girl, hearing that song, at that particular moment, makes it stand out so much more. It makes you listen to the lyrics and take in every last word of what he says, because it is those words that makes the moment oh-so-perfect, and absolutely priceless!
It's exactly one week after exams. I was so happy, so full of life, so 'free'. Little did I know the weeks that would follow would be so miserable. Straight after I got out of that final exam on Wednesday the 28th of November, I felt a sudden rush, I felt as if I could do anything I wanted to and nobody would tell me to stop.. and to my surprise, I was right! That whole afternoon I was out and about, eating lunch with friends, just chilling out, and then watching late night movies. It was great, absolutely priceless, I couldn't have wished for it any other way. Usually my parents would let me go out after school but i had curfews and certain things i had to do before-hand. But on that particular night, the amount of freedom I was granted was absolutely unbelievable! Thursday and Friday werent so bad either, we didnt have much homework, received some of our results - which of course lead to various emotions, ranging from ecstatic to pretty far down in the dumps - and our classes were a little more laid back. Excitement was seen in the hallways through the bounce that the students had in their steps - school was finally starting to seem okay! Then came Monday...
Unfortunately, things went back to normal. The overflow of homework came pouring in, the bounce in the students steps slowly stopped and the freedom that was experienced over those few days following exams, was no longer seen. I, personally, didnt expect to get an overflow of homework right after exams, but then i realized: This is IB! It wasnt necessarily just the homework, but it was also the fact that our CAS was due, along with certain parts of our extended essays that we havent even thought about due to our stressing over exams and other assesments such as tests, presentations and IOP's. I guess it's not that these things are all extremely difficult, I think it's just that I got so used to that idea of freedom (even though it was only for a few days) that i didnt prepare myself for what was still to come. Yes, in the back of my mind I knew that these things were coming, but i didnt want to believe it, so I could make the most of my 'freedom'. Urgh, big mistake!
Unfortunately, things went back to normal. The overflow of homework came pouring in, the bounce in the students steps slowly stopped and the freedom that was experienced over those few days following exams, was no longer seen. I, personally, didnt expect to get an overflow of homework right after exams, but then i realized: This is IB! It wasnt necessarily just the homework, but it was also the fact that our CAS was due, along with certain parts of our extended essays that we havent even thought about due to our stressing over exams and other assesments such as tests, presentations and IOP's. I guess it's not that these things are all extremely difficult, I think it's just that I got so used to that idea of freedom (even though it was only for a few days) that i didnt prepare myself for what was still to come. Yes, in the back of my mind I knew that these things were coming, but i didnt want to believe it, so I could make the most of my 'freedom'. Urgh, big mistake!
Alrighty...well i just cant think of a topic today but i did find some very interesting facts that i thought i would share with you!...
1. IT IS ILLEGAL TO SLURP SOUP IN JEW JERSEY. ... what the? my dad would never last!
2. WOMEN BLINK NEARLY TWICE AS MUCH AS MEN. ...i wonder why...
3. IT IS A CRIMINAL OFENCE TO DRIVE AROUND IN A DIRTY CAR IN RUSSIA. ... strange...
4. AVERAGE PERSON LOSES TWO BALL POINT PENS A WEEK. ... im average!
5. IT IS AGAINST THE LAW IN CHICAGO TO EAT AT A PLACE WHILE IT IS ON FIRE. ... o good, i was gonna try that...
6. IT IS AGAINST THE LAW TO PAWN OFF YOUR DENTURES IS LAS VEGAS. ... ill keep that in mind...
7. A HOUSE FLYS BUZ IS IN THE MIDDLE OCTAVE, KEY OF F. ... so musical!
8. THE WORD GYMNASIUM COMES FROM THE GREEK WORD GYMNAZEIN WHICH MEANS "TO EXERCISE NAKED". ...bwahahaha!
9. LOS ANGELES'S FULL NAME IS "EL PUEBLO DE NUESTRA SENORA LA REINA DE LOS ANGELES DE PORCIUNCULA. ...whoa!
10. A PREGNANT GOLD FISH IS CALLED A TWIT. ... who thought of that?!?
11. IN ENGLAND THE "SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE" IS NOT ALLOWED TO SPEAK. ..right, cause that makes perfect sense...
12. EVERY TIME YOU LICK A STAMP YOU ARE CONSUMING 1/10 OF A CALORIE. ...yikes!
13. LEFT HANDED PEOPLE LIVE SLIGHTLY SHORTER LIVES THAN RIGHT HANDED PEOPLE. ...good thing im a righty!
14. WHEN INTOXICATED, AND ANT WILL ALWAYS FALL TO ITS RIGHT SIDE. ...who would try that?
15. WHEN SWANS STICK THEIR HEADS TOGETHER IT MEANS THEY WILL BE TOGETHER FOR LIFE. ...awwww
16. TOPLESS SALES WOMEN ARE LEGAL IN LIVERPOOL, ENGLAND, BUT ONLY IN TROPICAL FISH STORES. ... yea..well duhh
17. IN FLORIDA IF YOUR SINGLE, DIVORCED OR A WIDOWED WOMAN YOU CANT PARACHUTE ON A SUNDAY AFTERNOON. ..what
18. IN CARMEL NEW YORK IT IS ILLEGAL FOR A MANS JACKET AND PANTS NOT TO MATCH. ...haha i love this law!
19. YOU ARE MORE LIKELY TO GET ATTACKED BY A COW THAN A SHARK. ...thats sad...
20. THE ONLY FOOD THAT COCKROACHES WONT EAT ARE CUCUMBERS. ...good to know
haha wow some of those things were actually cool!...and some..well... :p
~Hana
1. IT IS ILLEGAL TO SLURP SOUP IN JEW JERSEY. ... what the? my dad would never last!
2. WOMEN BLINK NEARLY TWICE AS MUCH AS MEN. ...i wonder why...
3. IT IS A CRIMINAL OFENCE TO DRIVE AROUND IN A DIRTY CAR IN RUSSIA. ... strange...
4. AVERAGE PERSON LOSES TWO BALL POINT PENS A WEEK. ... im average!
5. IT IS AGAINST THE LAW IN CHICAGO TO EAT AT A PLACE WHILE IT IS ON FIRE. ... o good, i was gonna try that...
6. IT IS AGAINST THE LAW TO PAWN OFF YOUR DENTURES IS LAS VEGAS. ... ill keep that in mind...
7. A HOUSE FLYS BUZ IS IN THE MIDDLE OCTAVE, KEY OF F. ... so musical!
8. THE WORD GYMNASIUM COMES FROM THE GREEK WORD GYMNAZEIN WHICH MEANS "TO EXERCISE NAKED". ...bwahahaha!
9. LOS ANGELES'S FULL NAME IS "EL PUEBLO DE NUESTRA SENORA LA REINA DE LOS ANGELES DE PORCIUNCULA. ...whoa!
10. A PREGNANT GOLD FISH IS CALLED A TWIT. ... who thought of that?!?
11. IN ENGLAND THE "SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE" IS NOT ALLOWED TO SPEAK. ..right, cause that makes perfect sense...
12. EVERY TIME YOU LICK A STAMP YOU ARE CONSUMING 1/10 OF A CALORIE. ...yikes!
13. LEFT HANDED PEOPLE LIVE SLIGHTLY SHORTER LIVES THAN RIGHT HANDED PEOPLE. ...good thing im a righty!
14. WHEN INTOXICATED, AND ANT WILL ALWAYS FALL TO ITS RIGHT SIDE. ...who would try that?
15. WHEN SWANS STICK THEIR HEADS TOGETHER IT MEANS THEY WILL BE TOGETHER FOR LIFE. ...awwww
16. TOPLESS SALES WOMEN ARE LEGAL IN LIVERPOOL, ENGLAND, BUT ONLY IN TROPICAL FISH STORES. ... yea..well duhh
17. IN FLORIDA IF YOUR SINGLE, DIVORCED OR A WIDOWED WOMAN YOU CANT PARACHUTE ON A SUNDAY AFTERNOON. ..what
18. IN CARMEL NEW YORK IT IS ILLEGAL FOR A MANS JACKET AND PANTS NOT TO MATCH. ...haha i love this law!
19. YOU ARE MORE LIKELY TO GET ATTACKED BY A COW THAN A SHARK. ...thats sad...
20. THE ONLY FOOD THAT COCKROACHES WONT EAT ARE CUCUMBERS. ...good to know
haha wow some of those things were actually cool!...and some..well... :p
~Hana
Tuesday, December 4, 2007
No matter how hard I try I know that I'll always be looking in from the outside. No matter how nice they try to be, the wall is too tall, too thick for penetration.
For a part of my life I truly believed I was one of the naturally smart ones. That time being the time I moved to Richmond after being in a national Indo pre-school class doing page long math addition problems every night. And then came years of cruising through projects, essays, and tests. Eventually though, learning became something I wasn't forced to do. University life with its worldly professors, cramped dorms, late nights, and intellectual discussions had attracted my efforts. That was what I made university life to be in my mind then. And for that I actually tried spending hours stuffing my head with random facts to appear to look smart when I would dish out useless information to my friends about dead guys in history. I knew I wasn't naturally gifted but I'd like to think I fooled a lot of people. Here and now I know where I stand in school's social-academic ladder. But that lure of university facade is calling me back and has actually led me to think I can achieve that level of scholarly stupor. Something that seems to be seeping out of that particular group.
Ironically, I'm not sure they realize how exclusive they actually are. They try to be quite inclusive actually, warming up to strangers and sharing polite smiles to those of different social cliques. No matter how friendly and just darn nice they are though, it won't take away from the fact that anyone who dares venture into their realm will undoubtedly feel more excluded then they were before. They exude an air of confidence and intelligence that equally amazes and intimidates. They are the humanitarians, the debaters, the politicians, the orators, the leaders. They are the ones talking Nietzsche and foreign affairs in a Starbucks Saturday afternoons and the ones staying up on school nights to watch 'feed-me' TV only to analyze it and come back the next day ranting about how the last episode was so the Edgar Allen Poe horror.
Each individual of that group adds something dynamic to the table. Some are really school smart and it shows. The others are perpetual idea machines. Some are drama queens, while some could probably be identified as professional cynics if there ever was such a thing. Their tastes in music, movies, clothes go from one end of the spectrum to the other but it's their thirst, their hunger that unites them.
Not to say also that I'm not one any of those things or I couldn't do any of those, but they certainly have a certain spark that most people seem to lack.
On the surface they're just another clique in this high school circus. If you look deeper - really get to know who they are and why they're here - it becomes obvious that when you sit down to have a real conversation with them the enigma sitting in front of you will begin to unravel its many layers.
If nothing else deserves one's envy in this school, they certainly would be the closest.
For a part of my life I truly believed I was one of the naturally smart ones. That time being the time I moved to Richmond after being in a national Indo pre-school class doing page long math addition problems every night. And then came years of cruising through projects, essays, and tests. Eventually though, learning became something I wasn't forced to do. University life with its worldly professors, cramped dorms, late nights, and intellectual discussions had attracted my efforts. That was what I made university life to be in my mind then. And for that I actually tried spending hours stuffing my head with random facts to appear to look smart when I would dish out useless information to my friends about dead guys in history. I knew I wasn't naturally gifted but I'd like to think I fooled a lot of people. Here and now I know where I stand in school's social-academic ladder. But that lure of university facade is calling me back and has actually led me to think I can achieve that level of scholarly stupor. Something that seems to be seeping out of that particular group.
Ironically, I'm not sure they realize how exclusive they actually are. They try to be quite inclusive actually, warming up to strangers and sharing polite smiles to those of different social cliques. No matter how friendly and just darn nice they are though, it won't take away from the fact that anyone who dares venture into their realm will undoubtedly feel more excluded then they were before. They exude an air of confidence and intelligence that equally amazes and intimidates. They are the humanitarians, the debaters, the politicians, the orators, the leaders. They are the ones talking Nietzsche and foreign affairs in a Starbucks Saturday afternoons and the ones staying up on school nights to watch 'feed-me' TV only to analyze it and come back the next day ranting about how the last episode was so the Edgar Allen Poe horror.
Each individual of that group adds something dynamic to the table. Some are really school smart and it shows. The others are perpetual idea machines. Some are drama queens, while some could probably be identified as professional cynics if there ever was such a thing. Their tastes in music, movies, clothes go from one end of the spectrum to the other but it's their thirst, their hunger that unites them.
Not to say also that I'm not one any of those things or I couldn't do any of those, but they certainly have a certain spark that most people seem to lack.
On the surface they're just another clique in this high school circus. If you look deeper - really get to know who they are and why they're here - it becomes obvious that when you sit down to have a real conversation with them the enigma sitting in front of you will begin to unravel its many layers.
If nothing else deserves one's envy in this school, they certainly would be the closest.
Labels: cliques, high school
Ok so my cousin just had a baby boy. It was a month in a half early and had the cord wrapped around its neck...how sad! Plus this poor guy doesn't even have a name yet because he came so early haha. But that is not the reason why i am writing this blog. You see my cousin was always the type that NEVER wanted to get married..let alone have children. Her dream was to be a brain surgeon and adopt 2 little African girls. HAHAHA...that dream obviously never happened. So when she got engaged at the end of high school we were shocked! And when she got pregnant a year later, we were seriously floored! But i am really happy for her. She has a wonderful husband and now a new baby christmas present! But all of this stuff just got me thinking... what we picture our selves doing in 5 or 10 years, or what we want for ourselves in the future is definetly not always what is going to happen. Most of the time God has much bigger and better things ahead. That helps me because sometimes i get hung up on how to get that certain guys attention, or how i am going to break the news to my parents that i failed yet another bio test. But i have started to realize that no matter what we think or do Gods will, will always happen. I mean im not saying to fail every test and turn into a hag because nothing matters anymore. Im just saying that it helps and can be a comfort, especially when we are all trying to figure our who and what we want to be, or what college we want to go to, or any of that. It is so easy to get wrapped up in what we want and the way we want our life to go..but if my cousin had applied for medical school instead of getting married she would not be where she is today. That doesn't mean not to follow your dreams though. i guess i just realized that dreams can change...actually they usually do.
~Hana
~Hana
Monday, December 3, 2007
In TOK class we have been learning about languages and how they are so closely connected to knowlege, in fact, without some way to communicate, knowledge would be quite unuseable. Similarily, love languages bring people together in a way that would be impossible without them. The five main love languages are:
Touch ~ a hug, holding hands, or even a simple squeeze on the shoulder
Words ~ saying I love you, thank you or wishing them a great day
Gifts ~ a card, flowers, anything, no occasion needed
Time ~ taking time out of your busy schedule just to spend time with them
Service ~ babysitting the kids, making their favorite meal, doing something to help them out
The range of importance of these depends on each individual so it is important to be observant and figure out which of these is most important to your loved ones. Once you know each other's prime love language, you will be able to love more effectively and deeply!
As for me (hehe), I think my main love languages are touch, time, and words. I guess that would make me a very touchy feely person ya? Hahaha..well, honestly hand hold is one of my favorite acts of affection. I also feel loved when I know someone has put effort into spending time with me, it's called sacrifice. And last but certainly not least, words. It is true that words can either build a man up or tear him down. A simple "I love you" straight from the heart is one of the most beautiful uses of language ever made.
Now it's your turn. Go through the list and decide which love language or languages is the most important to you. Look for those acts of love when you are around your loved ones, you may need to let them know which make you feel loved the most, they may have no idea. Then observe or even ask them which are most important to them and try your best to live up to it. Without a doubt, whether it is one of your family members, spouse, your bestfriend, boyfriend or girlfriend, you will develope a better relationship with them by putting their needs infront of your own and show them the kind of love they yearn for.
written by kendal m.
Touch ~ a hug, holding hands, or even a simple squeeze on the shoulder
Words ~ saying I love you, thank you or wishing them a great day
Gifts ~ a card, flowers, anything, no occasion needed
Time ~ taking time out of your busy schedule just to spend time with them
Service ~ babysitting the kids, making their favorite meal, doing something to help them out
The range of importance of these depends on each individual so it is important to be observant and figure out which of these is most important to your loved ones. Once you know each other's prime love language, you will be able to love more effectively and deeply!
As for me (hehe), I think my main love languages are touch, time, and words. I guess that would make me a very touchy feely person ya? Hahaha..well, honestly hand hold is one of my favorite acts of affection. I also feel loved when I know someone has put effort into spending time with me, it's called sacrifice. And last but certainly not least, words. It is true that words can either build a man up or tear him down. A simple "I love you" straight from the heart is one of the most beautiful uses of language ever made.
Now it's your turn. Go through the list and decide which love language or languages is the most important to you. Look for those acts of love when you are around your loved ones, you may need to let them know which make you feel loved the most, they may have no idea. Then observe or even ask them which are most important to them and try your best to live up to it. Without a doubt, whether it is one of your family members, spouse, your bestfriend, boyfriend or girlfriend, you will develope a better relationship with them by putting their needs infront of your own and show them the kind of love they yearn for.
written by kendal m.
This is what I call Kendalism...
If yellow was colorless, fish would drown.
If the wind was stiff, we would fly on the ground.
If feathers melted, grapes would turn to rocks.
If space was pink, our ears would wear socks.
If boys flew elephants, french fries would melt in cracks.
If sunshine was unethical, babies would come on racks.
If jellybeans grew arms, water bottles would eat shoes.
If glass was hairy, our livers would take a snooze.
If plastic covered the earth, fresh milk would be toxic.
If a guitar wet the bed, cotton balls would become exotic.
If sunsets ate garfield, monkeys would eat ice cream out of a boot.
If flies could tell time, telephones would fry fruit.
..yes, random is my fort`e!
If yellow was colorless, fish would drown.
If the wind was stiff, we would fly on the ground.
If feathers melted, grapes would turn to rocks.
If space was pink, our ears would wear socks.
If boys flew elephants, french fries would melt in cracks.
If sunshine was unethical, babies would come on racks.
If jellybeans grew arms, water bottles would eat shoes.
If glass was hairy, our livers would take a snooze.
If plastic covered the earth, fresh milk would be toxic.
If a guitar wet the bed, cotton balls would become exotic.
If sunsets ate garfield, monkeys would eat ice cream out of a boot.
If flies could tell time, telephones would fry fruit.
..yes, random is my fort`e!
So it is 3 days into December. The stocking are hung the tree is decorated and christmas music is playing throughout the town... but i still can't seem to get into the christmas spirit. There is one thing that is missing from the season this year... snow! Back in the US the coming of the holiday season was marked by cold weather, the downfall of snow and icicles hanging off the trees. Without that i just can't bring myself to believe that christmas is coming. I mean of course i believe it but it just doesn't feel like it to me. I keep blasting "chestnuts roasting on an open fire"... one of my favorite christmas songs... in my room but that doesn't seem to do it. Last night i even turned my AC up on high and put my big comfy sweats on. Then i put my Mariah Carey christmas album on with some hot chocolate and started sewing christmas bags (what?!?!)... and ill admit that for a time it actually did work. That is until i looked out my window to find a big palm tree and remembered that i am in the middle of tropical weather... not Oregon's frigid winters. I don't know why snow is something that means "CHRISTMAS IS COMING" to me but it really does. Usually on christmas we make hot chocolate and cider and bundle up in out cute sweaters and boots and go for a christmas walk. Or we sit by the fire all warm and toasty eating carmel corn and cookies....ahhh the joys of christmas in America. Usually we get in the hot tube and dare each other to roll in the snow and then get back in the water while burning our skin off from the shock of the temperature. Usually we go sledding or have a huge snowball fight. I guess you could have a mango fight or something here but they might hurt a little more.
So this year i think me and my family will start some new traditions. Maybe there is no snow but hey we can still find ways to feel warm and fuzzy inside. After all christmas time is supposed to be a time to gather up all your family and enjoy each others company on the day our savior was born. So rain, shine, snow or... cookie dough?... i will get into the christmas spirit this year!
~Hana
So this year i think me and my family will start some new traditions. Maybe there is no snow but hey we can still find ways to feel warm and fuzzy inside. After all christmas time is supposed to be a time to gather up all your family and enjoy each others company on the day our savior was born. So rain, shine, snow or... cookie dough?... i will get into the christmas spirit this year!
~Hana